DEAR CHRISTINE: He treats me like somebody’s dog

Tue, June 19, 2012 - 12:00 AM

Dear Christine,

IT HAS BEEN a long time since I’ve been meaning to write you, but things looked as though they were changing. Now,I am back at square one and I need you help.

I am 22 years old and friendly with a 46-year-old married man. We have a child together. This man treats me in the worst way – as though I am somebody else’s dog, for I believe he would treat his own dog even better. Yes, he gives me money when I need it, but he calls me all kinds of names and is always seeking to make noise at the slightest thing.

What has me so puzzled is that I have many friends who often seek me out for advice but I am not able to give them any advice. Please do not tell me that I like the treatment I receive.

I tried, but was not successful. What should I do?

– J.P.O

Dear J.P.O,

There is a saying, “when at first you don’t succeed try again.” You need to do just that; try leaving again but make sure when you do, you are an independent woman who does not have to wait around for his money.

No relationship can strive on abuse and I honestly believe that what is holding you together is the money he gives you. It is because of that that you are putting up with his verbal abuse.

This man is old enough to be your father and you had no right with him in the first place – not because of his age, but because he is married. Married persons are to be left alone any time they come a-calling or even if there is infatuation on your part. Remember this!

It makes no sense trying to build a future around them, or trying to get things to work out between you two.

If you can make yourself independent you’ll find that the rest of him is just not worth the hurt and humiliation you have to put up with.

Don’t throw away any more of your life in a situation as miserable as the one you’re currently in. Work your way out of it, and I mean WORK REALLY HARD. Work for your own wages then you won’t have to hold your hand out for what he puts in it, or the abuse he dishes out.

And please, do not allow your present situation stop you from reaching for the skies. Set your goals high and move on with the rest of your life. Things will get better once you let go.

– CHRISTINE