Nation e-Edition

DEAR CHRISTINE: Need a job so I can turn my life around

DEAR CHRISTINE: Need a job so I can turn my life around

Tue, February 19, 2013 - 12:00 AM

Dear Christine,

I’m writing this letter to you because I believe you actually care about helping others. I’m 23 years old and living with my boyfriend’s parents. Life has dealt me a very bad hand from the get-go. I now feel it’s more than I can bear so I’m contacting you as my last hope.

I was exposed to sexual abuse from a child. During my teen years I was often physically and emotionally abused by my stepfather to the point where I couldn’t take it anymore and attempted suicide.

The Queen Elizabeth Hospital assigned me a psychologist and I attended at least two sessions. The psychologist told my mother that my stepfather would have to leave the house. However, my mother did not like what she heard and never took me to my next appointment. In addition, my stepfather never moved out and the abuse continued.

I slumped into a dark depression and often skipped school. Every teacher labelled me a troublemaker. They never tried to get to the source of my problems.

After completing my secondary education, I stayed home in bed for three years without any interest in life or work. All I did during that period was eat and sleep. So great was my depression that I gained unwanted pounds.

After constant pressure from my mother, I found a job. However, my depression got the best of me and I lost my job due to poor attendance.

During my school days I did not sit the Caribbean Examinations Council exams because of my illness. Now, I cannot afford classes since my boyfriend and I aren’t employed. However, I thought to myself I could try to sit the exams without tutoring. After all, my lack of qualifications was not due to a lack of intelligence.

I got a relative to pay for me to sit two of the exams and I gained English language at Grade 1 and social studies at Grade 3. This was achieved without any guidance or tutoring.

I would love to tackle more difficult subjects, but I know those would call for tutoring. However, I need a job to pay for them.

While I was working I opened some hire purchase accounts which I haven’t been able to pay. Since losing my job, debt collectors have been looking for me and one company has me in court.

Christine, I don’t want to go to jail. I now feel on the brink of suicide, as I am in desperate need of a job.

I worked in customer care for one year and four months and I believe that experience has given me invaluable insight into any communications industry. I would prefer a job as an office assistant or customer service representative.

However, if those options are not available to me, I am willing to do any honest work. I’m hoping that some kind-hearted person will give me the opportunity to prove myself in the world of employment again.

Christine, I would be forever grateful. I feel tired in my spirit and soul. Please help me.


Dear Desperate,

I am touched by your letter and understand your frustration. I can also see you’re intelligent, based on your letter.

As I have said several times, suicide is never an option. It does not solve problems. Rather, it makes situations more complicated, because then you leave scores of people behind to deal with your demise.

Even more importantly, and I have to be frank and honest with you, you would be sending your soul straight to hell. Earthly torment is one thing, because there is hope in God. Eternal torment is another, there is no hope and no escape. Don’t lose hope.

I receive letters like yours on a regular basis. The cry is always for a job or financial assistance.

I am placing your letter before the citizens of Barbados, with the hope that someone will reach out and offer you employment if they can.

Failing that, I hope there are people who can help pay your bills and ease your financial stress until employment comes.

I know my assistant has made contact with you and a counsellor should have communicated with you, by now, to help you through this ordeal.

Hold on and believe things will get better. God has a future for you.


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Posted by dirtyokra two point o 1 year, 8 months ago
I don't know what extent your debts are. You shouldn't be feeling scared about going to jail over debts. Usually this would just ruin your credit not have you serve jail time. Think about the long term. Declare bankrupcy and expect to have zero credit for the next 7 years. This can take the stress of possible jail time away. Make your boyfriend find some work. No matter what. Customer service jobs are available. Look online for companies who are outsourcing to other countries. Use craigslist and search openings in Canada and the USA. This sort of phone work can be done with a computer and voip phone line. (Basically free long distance via internet) Do your tutoring at night. You can do this. You have the drive and the smarts. It'll be hard but you can do it and it will be worth it.

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Posted by D. Stoute 1 year, 8 months ago
I guess in Barbados abuse of children - sexual, physical, emotional - has no repercussions to the perpetrator. Anyone can just ruin lives and walk away scott free. How many others out there are semi/non-functional and on the brink of suicide because of abuse? In this so-called "Christian" country, when will Barbadians get serious about this heinous, rampant crime against defenseless children?

I wish this young lady the very best. She is smart and deserves a break after what she has endured without the empathy and support of those who should have been her protectors.

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