“O taste and see that the Lord (our God) is good! Blessed (happy, fortunate, to be envied) is the man who trusts and takes refuge in Him.” – Psalm 34:8 AMP
There are perhaps millions of recipes across every country in the world in several categories, including fruit, vegetable, meat, poultry, seafood, bread and beverages, just to name a few. They are all created differently to satisfy the diverse taste buds of different people in different places at different times for different occasions.
Some recipes leave people fully satisfied with a desire for more. Other people complain of being nauseous and pledge never to return to those eating places. I have had a taste of both experiences.
I want to introduce you to a fruit recipe that has a tantalising taste when skilfully prepared by the true world-renowned record-winning Chef who has won every competition each year in fruit category. No one has ever been able to outmatch or out-taste this finished product.
It is my pleasure to present to you the Master Chef, the Creator of the world. His recipe is documented in His famous Book, the Bible. Check it out in Galatians 5: 22-23. There are no hidden secrets about it. It is plain for all to see and try. The Master Chef has even given it a name: The Fruit of the Spirit.
This recipe has a perfect blend of nine ingredients: love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control that make it by far the most delicious recipe for all to try, especially married couples. When a married couple tastes the whole mix, prepared in Heaven’s kitchen, the result will be a lasting and loving relationship. In order to do justice to this recipe, it will take me three articles, each of which will carry three ingredients. Today the first three ingredients – love, joy and peace – will be scrutinised.
This first ingredient, love, should not be confused with the many other types of love that exist. This special type is divine love (Agape). It is described as a strong, ardent, tender, compassionate devotion to the well-being of someone. This love is placed first on the list because it is the main ingredient that flavours and tenderly holds together all the components of this recipe. It is genuine and unlike other kinds, is patient, kind; not jealous, boastful, rude, selfish nor quick-tempered. It does not keep a record of wrongdoing, but delights in the truth and is always supportive, loyal, hopeful and trusting.
The Master Chef lays out all of these characteristics in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7. When a married couple savours love of this quality, and permits it to dwell in the belly of their relationship, the deadly worms of hatred, bitterness, anger and unforgiveness cannot survive.
I recall a couple speaking of how they were always at each other’s throats before asking God to give them His kind of love. They said that the more they kept this love inside of their marriage, the more their attitudes changed toward each other and they began for the first time to know what genuine love was all about. Their marriage is still going strong today. Divine love continues to work for many other marriages today.
The second ingredient, joy (Chara), is described as emotional excitement, gladness, delights over blessing received or expected for self and for others. I have solemnised several weddings over the years and it was evident from the couple’s smiles, and emotional enthusiasm, that they were joyful that the day had come for them to say “I do”.
This unpretentious joy that is a part of the Master Chef’s recipe for a marvellous marriage, if allowed to be kept within the most intimate parts of the marriage relationship, will generate a genuine desire for the couple to have fun with and delight in each other, no matter the challenges faced. This divine joy always seeks to elevate the other spouse.
Jealousy and sadness are never a part of its character. After years of sadness, a young man who could not appreciate his wife’s achievements, asked the Master Chef for this joy. He told me that subsequent to his divine experience that his whole appreciation for his wife changed for the better. After acquiring joy, securing peace is a must.
The third ingredient, peace (Eirene), is described as a state of quietness, rest, order and security in the midst of turmoil, strife and temptation. This peace that was given by the Master Chef is not the absence of war, but is powerful in the midst of war; the same is true for any ‘war’ that may arise in marriage.
This peace, if relished in both favourable and unfavourable circumstances, will distribute two important nutrients to the brain and the nervous system: a unique sense of calm and tranquility. The lesser quality peace is offered by the “defeated chef”, Satan, and is only present in favourable circumstances, as mentioned in St John 14:27.
God-given peace prevents worry. It is more brilliant than the greatest academic scholar and gives a constant assurance that all is well despite the adversities that may arise in any situation especially in your marriage (Philippians 4:6-7).
Many years ago a couple told me that their business, once booming, collapsed right before their eyes. The husband remarked that it was humbling, and painful, but then he said something that stayed with me: “I am too blessed to be stressed.” Knowing the gravity of this husband’s situation, the peace of God had to be at work in him. God’s peace definitely works.
The combination of love, joy and peace can bring a measure of satisfaction to your marriage, but there are six more vital ingredients to be added. Long-suffering, kindness and goodness, the next three ingredients, will be added in the next article.
• Reverend Haynesley Griffith is a marriage and family life consultant. Email: griffitharticles@gmail.com
