Dear Christine,
My husband and I are the proud parents of two children – both teenagers. We have been married for 15 years and as far as I know, we’ve never had a third party in our marriage.
That was until nine months ago when I got intoxicated at an office party and had sex with one of my co-workers.
It wasn’t like it just happened. This was a guy who would always drop little hints to let me know how he felt about me. Since that night, we have not slept with each other. In fact, a few days after it happened we apologised to each other.
That night, we had unprotected sex; something I never would have done had I been in my right mind. To cut a long story short, I am now pregnant and I am wondering if the child is my husband’s.
It is true that my husband (who is a really a wonderful man) and I have never had a break in our intimacy. In fact, we had intercourse a day after this incident, but I am feeling guilty about what happened back then.
I am wondering if I should tell my husband about that one night, or for the sake of all involved, leave things as they are.
Countless times I have prayed and asked the Lord to forgive me for what I did, because as I said earlier, had I not been intoxicated, it never would have happened.
What should I do? Should I just let it go?
– W.L.
Dear W.L.,
Listen to me carefully. I am not asking you not to be honest with your husband, but I honestly believe it will not be in your best interest, that of your husband or your children for you to bring this matter to the fore at this stage.
What will your “confession” accomplish?
Your feelings of guilt about what happened seemingly have your mind working overtime. Don’t buy into this and ruin your marriage over something you did nine months ago, and have prayed about “countless times”. God has forgiven you. Accept His forgiveness and forgive yourself.
Your colleague has shown no further interest in you and he too has moved on.
Don’t live in the past. Leave well enough alone and may you and your husband have a healthy baby boy or girl.
My additional advice would be to stay off the alcohol, particularly if you have plans of attending other social events without your husband.
– CHRISTINE
