Dear Christine,
I have been in love with a young man for the past three years; and early last year he started having a secret affair with another woman.
Sometimes when I passed I would see him at her home or in the vicinity of her home. When I ask him about this he in turn would ask me what is wrong with a casual friendship.
Christine, I never made any fuss even though I knew all along he was having sex with her. Well, the truth came out when she got pregnant. I asked him about the relationship and he tried in all ways to talk me out of the conversation. I eventually gave up.
He used to say every day that he does not love the girl and nobody is going to make him love her; he loved only one woman and that woman is me. He even went on to say that he does not want to be connected to this woman.
Now that the baby is born he is there every day of the week. He still expects me to forget what happened and continue to be his girlfriend. I don’t see how that is possible. Christine, the only time he finds for me is one day every week or sometimes every two weeks.
I honestly would like for you to tell me what to do, as I am really hurt.
– R.P
Dear R.P,
Leave him with this woman and child. It’s as plain as it gets. Stop sitting around waiting for his infrequent visits and stop believing in your heart that you are his girlfriend. You are not! He’s using you.
He has betrayed you right before your very eyes and you have been too blind to see. However, that’s all in the past and you should free yourself totally from him. Have no strings attached. This child is the innocent victim and you should allow him time to bond with his child – who by the way is the innocent victim of his unfaithfulness to you and the child’s mother. I am sure he has made a lot of promises to her and she is looking forward to raising this child with him.
Come on, let’s truly be honest. Do you think he deserves your love, time and attention? I’m sure your answer is “no”. Stop wasting away your life on this cheater, and seek better for yourself. The hurt will eventually go away. Just give yourself time to heal.
– CHRISTINE
