Dear Christine,
I AM 24 YEARS OLD with one child. I weigh 140 pounds and feel like it is 200. I really do not look so fat but I cannot help but feel ashamed and ugly.
When my husband looks at other women, I feel sure it is because I am not nice to look at. It does not help when he calls me a horse or says: “Go get me a drink. You need the exercise.”
I have left him in the past and he always chases me down to get me back. It is not that I really think he will leave me, I just feel unattractive and I am sick about feeling this way about myself.
Of course, my husband’s taunts do not help the situation.
I am not from your country but my sister will send me your response when this letter appears. I know it is not your kind of relationship situation, but I’d like to hear from you nevertheless.
Thanks in advance for taking time to answer me.
– Dawne
Dear Dawne,
You are most welcome!
Let me say that I do not know what 140 pounds looks like on you, but I have seen many women who weigh that much and they are far from fat. I think you may have to look at how you dress and mak sure you groom yourself well. Wear sexy clothes (especially when you’re at home). Trust me, there’s nothing wrong with that.
Get yourself together so that in your eyes you look nice. Do this for you, not for your husband. If you need to, get a sister’s or best girlfriend’s opinion about what you are wearing.
In addition, if perhaps you need to lower your cholesterol and fat intake or if your doctor says change your eating habits, mind the doctor and do that – for your own health and self-respect. However, remember that weight does not equate to attractive or unattractive. If you get stuck with the idea that thinner is always better, you can starve yourself to death without ever feeling pleased with your body.
When you please yourself, other people can’t help being impressed and attracted to you, including your husband. And he will ask for a drink politely and knock off the teasing if you tell him to. Right now I think he is insensitive and uncaring, but that’s a situation you can put a stop to if you follow the advice given.
– CHRISTINE
