No money to pay for costumes

Sat, July 14, 2012 - 12:00 AM

A WELL-KNOWN PARTY ANIMAL who was planning to let it all hang out on Kadooment Day is now scrambling to find money to pay for the costumes she ordered.

Apparently the cheque she wrote out to the band house for the five costumes for herself and her close friends has bounced and she was told to settle the debt or return the bikinis.

Her friends are very embarrassed because she told them that she was paying for everything, but now they are realizing that she is broke.

Word around town is that she has been calling around trying to borrow the money, but this may be a difficult task for her because she has a reputation for living beyond her means.

Food for thought

A CERTAIN BOSS who likes to be saluted has once again shown how strange he is.

His attempts to ration food led to all-out war at the institution and uncontrollable food fights on a daily basis.

Now he has come up with another ridiculous solution to conserve food – affecting his hard-working staff, who are forced to work overtime because of a critical shortage of personnel.

He recently sent out a memo informing them that they would no longer be fed on the job. But while staff have decided once more to abide by his orders he may have to bring in more boots to provide security since they will certainly not be putting in the overtime.

One would expect that with all the land he was given that he would get the agricultural programme going on a much larger scale. But it seems that his focus is solely on the auto mechanic programme.

He should understand by now that a hungry man is an angry man.

Chaos in the camp

THEY SAY TWO HEADS are better than one, but that is turning out to be a fallacy at a Government institution where the best brains are usually employed.

It seems that the man at the top, who was imported, and his deputy, who loves to rule with an iron fist, have been causing much confusion of late.

First of all, the main boss has still not become acclimatized to the law of the land while the deputy continues to sideline her staff.

People are saying that the gavel needs to be brought down before their actions lead to a major lawsuit.

Not one cent!

THE FINANCIAL SITUATION at a certain club is once again being queried.

When the president presented his financial report earlier this year, he listed two payments to security personnel for providing services at an important annual event.

However, it has now come to light that this money was never paid and the security workers are planning to pull their services from any future events until they receive their monies.

Club members are now questioning who received the money and why it was listed on the financial statement as having been paid.

They are apparently fed up with the many financial irregularities and are once again calling for an audit of the accounts.

Voice silenced

A MIDDLE-AGED obnoxious man who has countless enemies all over the island had a stroke recently and has gone quiet.

The man, who is known for threatening people and assaulting women, has been in the background for several weeks, reflecting on his undistinguished past.

No one expects this bad-behaved man to change his ways, but some are hoping he stops shooting off his mouth or pistol.

A well-known person has promised that if this man does not keep the peace he will not bail him out again.