by SANKA PRICE

Memories don't leave like people do

They always stay with you,

Whether they've been good or bad

They were something that you've had. - Johnny Bristol

IT'S NOT EASY to forgive those who hurt you. And the Christian tenet of turning the other cheek, though often quoted, is usually ignored by many involved in emotional situations.

To put it bluntly, those who are hurt often want revenge. They want to get back at the individual for what he or she did to them.

And often when they can't do that, they harbour animosity against that individual for years. Hence this week's question: If you had a chance to say something to someone who had broken your heart, what would you say?

The several calls, texts and emails received suggested that people really wanted to get their pent up emotions off their chest. A few were unprintable due to the intense verbal venom spewed, but they, too, demonstrated how hurt some men and women still are, sometimes years after their split.

The one point that came through was the lack of communication between couples when these break-ups occur. It seems both parties just stop speaking to each other or, in some cases, one party just tries to lie their way out of the situation, only to compound the pain felt.

Clearly, if people were more forthright in their dealings with each other, painful splits could be minimised.

The following are edited versions of some of the responses received:

* "Why was it so hard for you to tell the truth at any time?

"Why did you have to go around telling lies about me just to get at these other women?

"Everything I did was for us, not for me alone. God is good and he has shown me the way. I will continue praying that you develop a conscience and learn to tell the absolute truth, hopefully before you leave this earth."

* "You are such a coward for not rising up to the challenges and pretending it was okay between us while it was going down the drain. I realise I didn't deserve someone like you."

* "I would like to ask her why she slept with another and got pregnant. I never loved a woman since. I never married or had kids because I never wanted any other woman."

* "Thanks for the good times we shared. I don't know what it is I said or did, but I would appreciate it if you could clarify it for me to better understand."

* "Why did you do the things you did? I don't need anything from you except the truth.

"A daylight meeting would be fine just to hear the truth if you can or know how to tell the truth."

* "Thanks for helping me become a better, stronger man because I know deep within my heart I did nothing wrong."

* "I hope you handle it just as well when it happens to you. The Father is not sleeping!"

* "You certainly didn't deserve me. Every dog has their day, God is watching - it was me today; it will be you tomorrow."

* "Who is sorry now? You have met your match. What a life, and what a world. Two marriages on the rocks and only the dog understands you when he wants something to eat."

* "My heart is mended and I am doing fine - thanks to time. I know that your life is in a mess, and I pray the best for you."

* "I hope when you drop, your eyes are still open when I step over you."

* "I got over you."

* "I hope you can handle it just as well as I did when your turn comes around."

* "Why? All you needed to be was honest."

* "What goes around comes around."

* "Thank you for bringing out the determination to succeed; giving me the strength to move on to bigger and better things; and realise:

"1. There was a lot of life left after you left;

"2. The food still tastes the same way now you are gone;

"3. My curtains still retract outwards to reveal daylight and I can actually go outside;

"4. When the mellow mood is on, every song is not about you;

"5. There are other women in the world;

"6. I can go to a function knowing that you may be there and not feel sick to my stomach should I see you with another man."