WID ALL THIS RAIN it put me back into de mind of when I was gine school. Fuh those of y’all that don’t know, I went to the best school in the north, The Alexandra School (pre Broomes).
Rainy days at school uses to be really interesting because no matter what you still had to go to school. The rain coulda be falling fuh 40 days and 40 nights and Mr Brathwaite would refuse to call off school until it reach ’bout midday.
That time to get out the school yuh had was to walk on benches. In more ways than one that school taught me to balance life.
To make matters worse, in order to get home I had to traverse through Holetown and those of you who are familiar with Holetown would know that all it took was a sneeze and a cough and there would flood. If you doubt me ask me. Many a day my mother sent me school to be the best I could be and I ended up being a boat just bobbing through the water.
But yuh see rain, it does mek Bajans do some funny things. Things like run out de sea ’cause dem ain’t want to get wet. A Bajan would run to a fire first before dem run to water. Furthermore I pass a water truck out St Lucy upwards to last Monday and de people refuse to run to it. Well in all fairness they probably didn’t expect it to have in water – moving on smartly.
You could be driving in traffic nice and sweet, clear roads ahead and as the rain drizzle you find yourself doing the traffic edition of the mannequin challenge.
But maybe with all this rain it would get people indoors and snuggle up so they can create more babies. That way the people would stop blaming the LGBT fuh the low birth rate. I don’t know who plan to bring up children in this world when dem can’t even afford to put gas in dem car cause tings gone up and de salary is still de same amount. Like seriously, the baby gine breastfeed till it is 18 years old?
However, the one thing for sure that I know this rain gine cause is a lack of bathing. Bajans ain’t bathing fuh nuttin wid this rain falling. Yuh gine hear tings like “I ain’t sweat”, “wuh I ain’t gine nuhway, ting”, “you see how cold outside is?” Jokes aside though, I beg wunnuh to catch some of this water ’cause we know how the water supply stop.
• Toni Johnson is an actress versed in the area of comedy. Email: firstname.lastname@example.org