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    December 16

  • 06:56 AM

YUH GAWH BE KIDDIN’: To beat or not to beat

TONI-ANN JOHNSON,

Added 17 February 2017

bloc-yuh-gawh-be

I CAN REMEMBER the first time that my dad ever made me cry. I was about 12 years old, I think. Mind you, he ain’t do nothing to me – it was all my brother. I have two brothers and for the sake of this story we will call them Jack and John.

One night Jack get de go-ahead to go out to a party. He did bout 16, I think, and the only rule was that he had to be back home by midnight. Anyway, my dad slept all night and as midnight hit he sit up straight like the undertaker.

“Where Jack?” Now I scared ’cause I know what was coming. John, on the other hand, was more than happy to shout out, “He aint home!”

Daddy get up now and left the house to go looking fuh Jack and left us home. The TV on and I scared, but John real excited like it is the night before Christmas. Ten minutes later Jack ease in de house.

“Daddy hey?” I had was to tell he that Daddy was out looking fuh he. Before de nincompoop go and get in he bed, he gone in de kitchen to mek a sandwich.

When Daddy ease in de house I knew that the end was near. He send Jack to get de belt and Jack went and look for it fuh two seconds, then come back and say he aint find it. Have no fear though ’cause John jump up and holler, “I know where it is!”

When de licks start to share Jack holler out fuh blue murder. All I hear was “Daddy, Daddy” so Daddy stop and look at he real confused. “Who is ur daddy?”

“You, Daddy”

“Not me, you too hardears!” And it was more blows from there. Meanwhile, John up in the bed smiling and cheering on like it is a football match, and I crying bad like it was me getting beat. This thing hurt my feelings fuh weeks, yuh.

My aunt now decide she gine jump between Daddy and Jack and holla fuh, “Stop!” Man, look, my father ain’t miss a beat and she get one cross she hand. She hop right back out and holla, “Guh long.” If you doubt me, ask me. When done, he ain’t get to eat the sandwich that he mek.

I know people have different views on if a parent should beat a child and some even call it abuse. . . . Me? I call it “how I grew up.” The decision as to whether it is right or wrong I leave up to you. I surely learned from his mistake though.

I am Toni-Ann “Acka” Johnson. Love, peace and Mazola Corn Oil.

Toni Johnson is an actress versed in the area of comedy. Email: toniann.johnson@gmail.com

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