What makes a school bully

by Alicia Barker-Grant

BULLYING AT SCHOOL is an old problem, where many took the "children will be children" attitude towards the problem. However, recent incidents have highlighted the serious and sometimes deadly consequences of bullying behaviour.

Dan Olwens PhD defines school bullying as "repeated negative, ill-intentioned behaviour by oneor more students directed against a student who has difficulty defending him/her self. Most bullying occurs without any apparent provocation on the part of the student who is exposed." In other words, bullyingis a form of violence that hurts others.

Bullying can be direct, such as hitting, tripping, shoving, pinching, verbal threats, name-calling, racial slurs, insults; demanding money, property, service; and stabbing, choking, burning and shooting.

Bullying can also be indirect, such as rejecting, excluding, isolating; ranking or rating, humiliating; manipulating friends and relationships; writing hurtful or threatening emails and postings on websites; blackmailing, terrorising, and proposing dangerous dares.

Traditionally, boys tended to bully in direct and physical ways, and girls tended to bully in emotional or indirect ways. However, influences such as media, technology and new forms of social power are beginning to blur the gender lines.

Some students are bullies; others are targets of bullying. A student can be both a target and a bullyat the same time. Some students are bystanders; bystanders can be either passive or active. Some acts of bullying at school can result in suspension and/or expulsion. Bullying breaks the law when it becomes stealing, assault and battery, extortion, sexual harassment, hate crimes and other criminal acts.

Administrators, teachers, school staff, students and parents must accept the responsibility to recognise, report and/or intervene with bullying when it occurs. Bullying that goes unchecked tends to escalate into more serious forms or even criminal behaviour.

Consequences of school bullying?

School bullying affects the safety and social well-being of the entire school community. Wanting and needing to belong at school is important to most students. Being put down, embarrassed, physically hurt or terrorised at school on a regular basis is hurtful for students at any level. Bullying can makea student feel unwanted and rejected.

Students who are targets of bullying spend their energy at school being afraid and worrying aboutwhen and how they will be bullied again. They may suffer direct pain and discomfort when the bullying
is physical.

They may begin to withdraw from school activities and areas where bullying takes place. They may begin to stay away from school. In the worst cases, some students become ill, depressed and even suicidal.

Some students take a vigilante approach and feel the need to fight back with weapons or in other dangerous ways.

Students who bully may think that they are in full control of what is happening. They may also think that the only ones being hurt are the targets of their bullying. The fact is that bullying also hurts the one who does it.

Next week: What students can doabout bullying.

*Alicia Barker-Grant is President of the Barbados Association of Guidance Counsellors (BAGC).