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MARKET VENDOR: How times have changed

rhondathompson, [email protected]

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LAST WEEKEND amid all the revelry I had a experience that reminded me of how life and times have changed and today I in a reflective mood.
Today we does tek a hundred and something channels on TV for granted and still can’t find something to watch. If you don’t have DVR to pause live TV, and record more than 2 channels at the same time and a universal remote to control everything, you ain’t saying a thing!
Gone are the days not so long ago when we were contented watching one local channel, in black and white and there was no need for the remote, the TV was either on or off. We didn’t have colour TV, plasma screens, Ipods, Iphones, Ipads, music was played ’pun a turntable, it could be 78 rpms, 45s for singles and later came the 33 1/3 LPs. You needed a warehouse to hold the collection.
Some can remember when wireless radio first came to Bubbadus in 63 and T.V in 64. The telephone had a hard wire fixed to a certain position if you were fortunate enough to have one, no wireless phone to walk ’bout the house and as fuh cellphones, when the first ones came the things was the size of a fire extinguisher and expensive.
I remember when faxes came into being and a fella would tell you proudly to fax it. Today iffing you talk ’bout faxing, you are from the dark ages. I remember a time when West Indies ruled the cricketing world with ruthless efficiency and men would have to have a colon cleanse before going out to face the West Indies fast bowling, lest they soiled their pants.
Today we are the laughing stock of world cricket but not fuh long, the face and names of West Indies cricket changing  fast and soon names like Santokie, Bishoo and Foo, of Asian, Amerindian and Chinese origin will grace Kensington Oval and restore the pride.
I never thought I woulda live to see the day that Gabby win a crown and get boo at the Pic-O-De-Crop Finals, but that day came to pass.
I never thought that the day woulda come when we in Bubbadus and Trinidad had to live with more iron bars than the prisons. So last week when one of my dear friends announced that he and the wife were heading overseas to a wedding, I was not that shocked to learn that it was a gay wedding, two guys tying the knot so to speak and friends and well-wishers forming a circle to stand behind them.
Wunnah laughing but the way things going any one of we might be attending a similar event sooner or later. I will have to wait for the reports of the actual event but how does this thing work? Does the officiating minister say, I now declare you man and man? You may kiss the bride? And exactly who is the bride, how do you know? Is there a father giver?
Usually at weddings there is a wedding party and guests kiss the bride, is this expected also? Does the groom say “my wife and I would like to thank you for attending our special day”?
Does the “bride’s” father say he is not losing a son but gaining one? Do they do the sticking of the cake in the traditional way? Do they play YMCA by the Village People? Are the bathrooms segregated or does one size fit all?
Do they adopt kids? And should the honeymoon be spent in Bubbadus what happens on arrival at Grantley Adams Airport, do they fill out the forms as husband and wife and on the back where it says spouse give the wife’s name as Steve?
What happens when they reach the resort, does the hotel put “Just Married” on the Limo  and do they welcome them as Mr and Mrs and leave flowers  in the room?
Wunnah laughing now but my buddy done tell the wife whose friend getting married that this event will cost her plenty brownie points, today is his turn but you never know sweet boy, tomorrow might be yours and that smile will be wiped off yuh face.
Like I said times are a changing but not the Vendor, I still got my weakness fuh sweetness and when last I checked there is only one way to get it!
• Market Vendor gone fuh now, you have a blessed and a wonderful day, yuh hear!

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