Dear Christine,
I am in a situation that I never wanted to be in again. I am seven weeks pregnant but the father and I are no longer together. We had a big fight over him being involved with someone else, so I moved out of his house and back in with my mother.
He does not know that I am pregnant. In fact, no one knows but you as I only found out three days ago. I am trying to decide what I should do.
Christine, my man has been begging me to come back to him and has told me sorry. But what is hurting me is that he knows I was hurt like this before and I walked out on that relationship too. Since he knew that, why did he hurt me in this way?
The other thing is, I have a seven-year-old from my previous relationship.
I am 29 years old. I don’t want another child for another man and not be involved with him. That is just not right and it would look as though I am slack.
What do you think I should do? Should I go back with him or stay at my mum’s house and raise my child alone, again?
 – J.N.
Dear J.N.,
You have every reason to be angry about your boyfriend having someone on you. In this day with so many sexually transmitted infections, I cannot understand why people continue to cheat so much.
It is as if they do not recognize that by stepping out they are endangering their lives and that of their partners.
The fact that you told him you were burnt in your previous relationship with similar infidelity makes his actions harder to take. So I can understand why you are angry and left his house.
Anyway, your main concern is about raising another child without its father around. The fact that this bothers you shows you recognize the importance of a father in his/her child’s life, and the implications of that.
As your boyfriend has apologized to you it seems that he has recognized the error of his ways. Perhaps he is regretting what he did to you and is sincere about his request. The only way you will know this for sure is to speak with him. You need to question him on his involvement with the other woman and assure yourself that it is over.
I urge you not to attack him on this. But listen to his explanations as to why he did what he did.
Based on how confident you feel about what he says, you will know what to do.
All the best to you. – Christine.
