Friday, April 19, 2024

BLABBERMOUT’ BABSIE – Howevuh yuh turn, yuh jes’ cyhan win

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Dear Nesta, 
I hope evuht’ing awright wid you as it is wid me.  
While evuhbody seem to be runnin’ ’bout like a chicken wid de head cut off, an’ gettin’ nowhey fas’, I hey in my corner – poor, peaceful an’ presumptuous – dodgin’, as bes’ as I could, de t’ings dat causin’ summuch stress nowadays.
I was readin’ a article in de paper de ethuh day ’pon de subjeck o’ stress. You would believe dat in de firs’ two monfs o’ dis year, Buhbayduss had six suicides? Dah’s a firs’ fuh we. People cyhan seem able to cope wid de everyday livin’, so feelin’ duh jes’ cyhan win, see dat as de only way out. Stress is a turrble t’ing.  It could tek a toll ’pon we healf an’ cause all sorts o’ sickness. 
Dat t’ing call depression – yuh got to be in dah state to tek yuh life – could turn yuh into a “zombie”, hear wuh I tell yuh? I see a advertisement pon’ TV fuh a certain medication to help dis situation, but when I hear ’bout all de side effecks yuh might get from tekkin’ it, I turn to Philomena an’ tell she, ef it was me, I prefer to stan’ depress.
Yuh could get glaucoma, dizziness, nausea, hypertension, high cholesterol, or high blood sugar. So wuh is de p’int o’ usin’ de drug? It look as ef some medicines does help one problem an’ let loose a bariffle o’ ethuhs ’pon yuh, so why tek it a-tall? I suppose, when some person sick, duh en studyin’ neffin so, an’ grab at anyt’ing fuh li’l relief. But at wuh price?  
Well, you know yuh frien’. I always try to stan’ far as possible from stressful situations – an’ all dem diff’rent medicines – but sometimes de stress does ketch up wid muh. I cyhan stan’ home fuhevuh, an’ as soon as I step out, stress mus’ tek ovuh. Dem four lanes alone, by Upton, now got muh repeatin’ de 91st Psalm by heart, ’cause dah is de onlies’ way to get ’cross dem an’ keep sane. De way drivers pelt down dah hill, very few seein’ dah 40km sign. Road hogs enuff  ’pon de roads. Duh honkin’ at yuh, ’cause yuh en move off de split secon’ de lights change to green, duh roarin’ pass yuh in a effort to get to de roundabout firs’, at night-time car lights blindin’ yuh, an’ generally, evuhbody in one rush.    
An’ I need not tell yuh ’bout de pollution swirlin’ ’bout yuh head from all dem vehicles dat need a good servicin’. I coulda swear I read some time early las’ year dat Guvment was “mekkin’ it a matter o’ urgency” to clean up de atmosphere. I en know ef it was only talk because de ethuh side, when in power, had a Environmental Management Act ’pon de books an’ din do one blessed t’ing ’bout it fuh all de years, an’ mebbe dis present side was tryin’ to show duh up.  Wuhevuh de reason, I still see nuff black smoke comin’ from vehicles an’ I wonderin’ ef de law pass yet. Ef dah is de case, it need enforcin’, ’cause jes’ like nuff ethuh laws ’pon we books, very few people noticin’ it.  
My nighber say she t’inkin’ ’bout gine fuh holiders to get ’way from all de stress. She hear ‘bout a airline dat suppose to be chargin’ cheap fares, but she en know whey it flyin’ to. I tell she when she fine out whey de tickets sellin’, leh muh know, ’cause it is monfs now, an’ we still lookin’ skyward fuh dah plane. I tell she don’ t’ink ’bout travellin’ by boat neiduh, ’cause dey agen, de Caribbean ferry we hear summuch ’bout like it get waterlog.
 
Tek care o’ yuhself,Yuh frien’ Babsie

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