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Don’t pray fuh me, Mr Gibbs!

rhondathompson, [email protected]

Don’t pray fuh me, Mr Gibbs!

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Years ago, a prime minister of a certain Caribbean country called de Vendor early one Sunday morning after worshipping at St Patrick’s Roman Catholic Cathedral and becausing I had said something that he disagreed with, proceeded to promise to put licks in my Brassbowl.
Ah had to explain to he that the brassbowl was used for only one purpose so could he put de licks somewhere else. The licks never came to pass, at least not fuh me, but I did live to see the said same leader hold plenty blows in he own bowl of Brass.
Perhaps it was because de Vendor had just come back from hearing de Word and praying, perhaps it was because plenty people does pray fuh me daily, but ah was grateful that my bowl of brass didn’t have in any dents!
Now I know that de ‘love man’ Fruendel would never threaten de Vendor, nor Ralphie, nor Kams, nor Bharrat, but I still does pray and I know nuff people praying fuh me daily!
So when I pick up de Nation newspaper of Thursday, April 14 and see a letter My prayer to Market Vendor, I say ‘Lord, wha I do now?’ I ain’t tax nobody, I ain’t tek way no allowance, increase no bus fare, so why dem praying fuh me?
I ain’t announce no increase in light bills like my friend Bob Worme, yet dem ain’t praying fuh he!
I ain’t stage no palace coup and deposed no leader past nor future, I ain’t cause selectors to drop Chanderpaul nor Sarwan, I ain’t cause no row between Bizzy and Neville, I ain’t cavity search no Jamaican nor send back no Guyanese, so why me Lord, why one Garfield Gibbs writing like he and I does eat fish in Oistins by Uncle George and Cynthia every Friday night and I don’t know he?
Why he writing saying he know de Vendor got a conscience and will understand how he feel?
Lord, you know I can hardly understand how a woman feel, I gwine understand how a man feel? And de man quoting the Good Book fuh me and while I grateful I must ask, why me?
And all because he vex that the programming pun the Gospel station get merge wid VOB! De man say he know I will agree wid he that moral standards disappearing and that the move by Starcom management will not help the situation.
No disrespect, sir, but I prefer to speak fuh muhself! But since you claim to know de Vendor so good and while I might be suffering from the early onset of “old timers” disease and don’t remember you, a suggestion from a simple Vendor.
As I understand it, from what Starcom has said, the CSS is designed as the first ever all-Caribbean radio station, serving all de people in the English-speaking Caribbean at the same time – seven countries at first but expanding as licences allow.
We people, we music, we news, we culture, and as we know, we got too much devision in de region. This station can only be a good thing, all ah we talking to one annudder, integrating this region finally.
Starcom do de best they could. They integrate the gospel programming wid VOB, so a bigger audience gwine hear de Word, muh brudder. VOB got three times de listeners of Gospel, whichin is what you praying for! But while you at it, pray fuh de licence that STARCOM say they apply for ‘cause if they get it, I know you gwine get yuh wish and I would be left out of yuh prayers!
l I, Market Vendor, gone fuh now. You have a blessed and a wonderful day, yuh hear?