AWRIGHT DEN – Women guilty too
I HAVE HEARD that boys struggle with it and that men are addicted to it. I have heard that men become slaves to it and that it has destroyed many families. I have even heard women say that the very thought of it is nasty and disgusting. Some even went on to say that these men are desperate and sick.
By now most of you would have guessed I am talking about pornography.
I know many women may be offended by what I will say next. However, I must “mash some corns” and share honestly and with kindness my thoughts on the topic.
I find it unprincipled and unfair that women would chastise men for watching porn (visual stimulation) when they themselves read it (mental stimulation).
I found out last week that many of the romance books and novels that large numbers of women habitually read contain sexual content, some more than others. These would include books by Danielle Steel, Sandra Brown, Stephanie Laurens, Sarah McCarthy, Eric Jerome Dickey and Zane, and from publisher Mills & Boon.
Many wives and other women in relationships feel hurt, ashamed, angry, disrespected, rejected and replaced when they catch their husbands or partners watching blue movies, reading Penthouse or Playboy magazines or viewing pornographic material via the Internet.
These same women spend many hours, days and weeks reading novels that contain some of the same content but in a more dangerous form. For a man, everything is there for him to see plain as day. For a woman, as she reads, she has to use her mental creativity to formulate images to represent what she is reading.
If four women read the same book, each will formulate different images. This means they are personalizing it by using their minds as a canvas to create their lustful fantasies. I think this form of porn is more dangerous than visual stimulation.
On Monday I went into Pages Bookstore to find out for myself if what I heard was true. I took up three books, one each by Danielle Steel, Eric Jerome Dickey and Zane, and sat down to browse through the books.
I must say I was excited, yet nervous, while looking through the books. In the back of my mind I was thinking, “What would someone who knows me think if they walk in here and saw me reading these books?” I laughed to myself and continued browsing.
Let me tell you something. Zane was the most explicit, followed by Dickey, then Steel. It was too graphic for me, and I found myself being tempted to read more, which would definitely have corrupted my thoughts, so I stopped.
I was thinking about quoting some lines from each book, but I knew the editors would have none of it. I am sure, however, that many of you females reading this can identify with what I am saying.
Men watch porn to fulfil their fantasies and women read it to fulfil theirs. On my Facebook page, we were discussing this same topic and every single male in the discussion supported my views and to my surprise many females did as well.
Some people even shared that while they were going to school, girls would bring to school these books to read.
I can testify of taking away a Zane book from a third form student, who told me she had been reading those books for a while.
Whether porn is watched or read, it is disadvantageous and has the ability to do more harm than good. Men have been caught and as a result some relationships have ended. Women have seldom been caught because men don’t really check what women are reading. Maybe they should.
Women, you too are guilty, so stop pointing fingers.
Your sin might look different to ours but in principle they are similar.
Pornography, in my view, is dishonouring, degrading, disrespectful, distasteful and deadly. It can and has destroyed relationships, poisoned many minds, corrupted many souls and has held many in bondage for years.
Corey Worrell is a former Commonwealth youth ambassador. Email [email protected]