Tuesday, April 23, 2024

PUDDING & SOUSE – Reaping what he sowed

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A MAN is now finding out what people mean when they say “revenge is a b****”
This ailing elderly man, who loved the ladies and splurged his cash on them, is now alone in his small house with no one to take care of him.
From what Pudding & Souse was told, when this man was in his prime he treated his wife badly by taking young things for a fling in his marital bed. After some years, wifey finally ran from his horns and his lashes, so he continued his wuffless life with whomsoever was willing.
But when his diabetes took a turn for the worse and his once proud sex appeal became a water spout, this man started to get horned left, right and centre by the young thing he had in his house. And he couldn’t handle it.
Eventually, he got rid of that girl, but now he is alone, unkempt and getting small from not eating cooked food too regularly, as he can’t cook.
It just shows that when you do bad, it can come back to haunt you.
 
Who’s daddy?
A WELL-KNOWN young woman who lives in the north has found out that you can hide and buy land, but you can’t hide and work it. To be precise, this lass is pregnant.
Her problem, though, is that she is having a hard time figuring out who her baby’s father is.
Is it her uniformed boyfriend who was supposed to be her main squeeze, or the minibus boy she went to school with? Or could it be the man with the big ride, who drives real slow with the windows down, and plays the music loud so everyone can look at him?
Her friends have not seen her for a while because she is staying indoors. But she can’t continue to hide the bun in her oven forever.
 
Rumaholic
FRIENDS OF AN affable man are worried that his intention to drink out A. Y. Ward, R. L. Seale and other distillers may soon cause his demise.
They are saying that this man, who spends freely on women young enough to be his granddaughters, may be close to kicking the bucket as his health is rapidly deteriorating. Yet, they complain, he just would not leave the liquor alone.
One concerned female told Pudding & Souse that all she can do when she sees him in a drunken state is to sing Poonka’s ditty: The rum gine kill yuh, Alcohol gine kill yuh, It gine kill, kill, kill kill, kill yuh . . .
 
True love
THE?TRUTH WILL set you free, it’s said, but do you tell the truth about someone at their funeral?
A wife did just that, and was frank about it too.
With a cultured voice she let it be known that her late beau loved women and they loved him back, including herself.
Though she didn’t go into details, the number of watery eyes among the many females in attendance was proof of her statement.
Those who heard the wife felt for her because they said that in spite of whatever happened between them, they seemed to have truly loved each other.
 

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