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DEAR CHRISTINE: Feeling burdened by my three kids


BEA DOTTIN, [email protected]

DEAR CHRISTINE: Feeling burdened by my three kids

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Dear Christine,
I’m writing with the hope that you will receive my letter and give me the necessary advice.
I am a young man in my thirties, who is trying desperately to make ends meet. The problem is my girlfriend. Christine, we have three children and I love them with all my heart even though I never wanted to have three children. It was my girlfriend who wanted to have another child, and so, unbeknownst to me, she went off the pill and child number three was born.
My reason for not wanting a third child was because I recognized that financially, I would not be able to maintain another child. Now that the three children are around, I am finding it hard to keep up with various payments.
My girlfriend wants me to look out for their every need. It is true that I have a relatively good job, but I also have personal financial commitments which must be met. She wants me to pay for their nursery care, food, clothes and the various activities in which they participate.
My oldest child is three years old, and the two girls are two years and 11 months.
Do you think it is right for me to shoulder all these responsibilities when she was the one who wanted a third child? She also works but most of the money she gets is spent on her. I am just trying to make ends meet.
What can I do?
– P.W.
Dear P.W.,  
Your girlfriend needs to shoulder some of the financial challenges you now face because she is the one who decided to have a third child. If she knew that it would become a financial burden on you, she should have made up her mind to spend her own money on child number three.
This is not to say you won’t have to live up to your responsibilities as the father. You two must now sit down and together develop a budget to determine how best to handle your financial obligations. I’m sure things will work out.
– CHRISTINE

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