Dear Christine,
I am a young woman with a good and secure job. I have two children from a man I have been living with for the past nine years. He loves them very much and always sees after their needs.
He is also very good to me.
However, just about three years ago, he started seeing a woman. The two of them are constantly seen together. He takes her out quite often and stays at her house regularly.
He does not hide this relationship at all – not even from me. Whenever I ask about our relationship, he refuses to answer. He would simply leave the house and go to be with this woman.
Christine, am I wasting my time? He has a job which necessitates his attending many social events, and most of the time he takes her to these functions with him. I really need your advice.
I am very annoyed with the situation and so are my relatives. This man lives in my mother’s house and it is her opinion that he should marry me as we are both single. What is your advice?
– Hurt
Dear Hurt,
You may not like my answer, but my advice is to cut him loose. Ask him to leave your mother’s house and make sure that he continues to support the two children.
Do you think you deserve this treatment? How many times have you asked him about his relationship with you? Do you think you need to ask when the answer is staring you in the face every day?
If he is so taken up with this woman, what role do you play in his life? Are you cooking, washing and cleaning up after him? Isn’t it enough that you are the mother of his children and that you have stuck around for nine years?
It’s nine years too long! Get him out of your mother’s house and out of your system. In fact, as far as I am concerned, you’ve been out of his life for three years now.
– CHRISTINE