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Time to get wid de programme

marciadottin, [email protected]

Time to get  wid de  programme

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Dear Nesta,
How you an’ yours, dear heart? I hey hol’in’ on an’ tryin’ to keep de body as healfy as I could ’cause wifout healf, yuh en sayin’ neffin.
Well, as you know, whenevuh we start a new year I always set out to try an’ improve muhself in some way, even ef it is jes’ goin’ t’rough de dictionary an’ learnin’ couple new words.
Don’ fuhget, one year I even try muh han’ at learnin’ de computer so dat nowadays I could hol’ muh own ’mong, believe it or not, six- an’ seven-year-oles.
Nowadays, people usin’ de Internet to transack all sorts o’ bizness – bankin’, grocery shoppin’, bill payin’, fillin’ application forms, filin’ income tax, even t’iefin’, so I realize dat, aldoh I en keen, I got to get mo’ involve wid de computer ’cause some o’ dem forms en de easies’ to fill.
I had experience wid one de ethuh day an’ get so fed up startin’ ovuh evuh time I mek a mistake, dat in de en’ I was glad enuff to fine somebody to do it fuh muh; I din cay wuh it cos’.
Hearin’ de Immigration Department now gone online as well got muh mo’ determine to brush up ’pon muh Internet skills. I now hey sprainin’ muh brain so dat when I got to apply fuh a passport later down in de year, I would know jes’ how to tackle it.  
I plan to fin’ out doh ef yuh really mus’ apply ’pon de Internet or ef yuh could still get a form from de department. It would help all dem people so like Philomena dat don’ really onderstan’ wuh goin’ on in de modern worl’ o’ de Internet.  
But Ness, I wonder ef organizations now usin’ all dese online application forms tek a moment to consider de fack dat a lot o’ older folk don’ know much ’bout computers, fu’thermore, de Internet, as duh never had reason to use one at wuk an’ some don’ see why duh should learn to use it now. Wid de rat race behin’ dem, some o’ dese people form completely new int’res’s, mos’ times, neffin to do wid a computer.  
Tell de troof, doh, all dese new-fangle gadgets dat now stirrin’ – iPad, iPod,  iPhone, BlackBerry, Kindle an’ all de ethuh “instruments o’ torture” de older folk tryin’ to deal wid – could really gi’e yuh a headache, faif.
Wuh got my head in a spin is de fack dat as soon as yuh brain settle ’pon one o’ de features an’ yuh start showin’ off dat yuh “wid it”, de company go an’ upgrade it an’ trouble start all over agen. Dese manufacturers know how to mek money.    
It does always mek me smile how nowadays people automatically axe fuh yuh email address, or BB pin, widout findin’ out ef yuh even know wuh duh talkin’ ’bout. Ef de answer is “no”, yuh gone straight in de ancient hist’ry bracket.
Hey, you hear ’bout de Notebook? I hope so an’ I hope yuh know dat to use it, don’ mean yuh need a pen or pencil as well.
Nuff people out dey don’ own a computer, far less know how to use it so de words “online” don’ mean one t’ing to dem. Anyway, I always hear one man’s meat is anethuh one poison so I hey brushin’ up ’pon fillin’ dem “online application forms” to start haulin’ in some cash. People enuff don’ onderstan’ de firs’ t’ing ’bout fillin’ dem.  
You bes’ get up an’ get yuhself a Notebook so we could keep in touch mo’ easy. After all, we got to get wid de programme too, y’know.
So iPad, iPod, iPhone . . . I gone!
Tek care o’ yuhself
Yuh frien’ Babsie

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