Dear Christine,
I’VE BEEN with a man for two years and in that time he has been having on and off affairs with about five other women.
Although he drinks and gets drunk he has made advances to my mother and sister when he was cold sober; so he cannot blame it on alcohol.
He is always interested only in how he looks.
Any woman who will tell him he is handsome, or something like he’s well built, is a woman he chases until he gets her, or until he insults her.
Even the men in his life are used by this man, and they seem flattered by his attention.
What is wrong with him? I love him, but I am beginning to worry.
– P.R
Dear P.R,
It seems to me that this man is a narcissist who is incapable of loving anyone. Most narcissists also lack emotional depth. Your friend sounds as if he
is so insecure that he must constantly find someone new to bolster his self-esteem.
Until he overcomes this extreme dependency upon the opinions of others, he will not be able to form any close, significant relationships.
The kind of change and development you are hoping to see will not happen overnight.
I think it is important to you to ask yourself why you have stayed with this man for so long.
Why are you attracted to a person who treats you so badly? You cannot change your friend, but you can change yourself by choosing not to adapt to his way of life. I am sure there is better out there for you.
– CHRISTINE