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DEAR CHRISTINE: I’m tired of my ex’s drinking problem

BEA DOTTIN, [email protected]

DEAR CHRISTINE: I’m tired of my ex’s drinking problem

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Dear Christine,
Even though my husband and I divorced in 2005, we have been seeing each other for the past two years and are trying to put things back together.
However, there is a problem. Every couple of weeks he comes to my house drunk and behaves badly in front of the children.
He never apologizes for anything he does or says, and it causes fights. He does not drink all the time but when he does, it’s a real challenge.
I have told him over and over not to come to the house if he has been drinking. If I try to make him leave, it makes matters worse.
How can I make it clear to him that I have had enough? I love him but I’m very tired of his drinking and behaviour.
I want my family back together, but should I get away from him altogether?
I have prayed about this for a long time. I have tried talking to him – nothing works. Please give me some advice.
Dear Desiree,
You say your ex does not drink all the time, but to be honest with you, once is too much, and if he is turning up drunk every few weeks, you have a big problem on your hands.
Perhaps you need to face the fact that as much as he may love you, he loves the bottle more and needs to seek professional help (from Alcoholics Anonymous) if you are to be a family again.
Meanwhile, if he shows up at your house drunk, do not open the door. If he creates a disturbance, call the police and let them handle him.
Your children are being damaged by his behaviour. Chances are they are not sure if he is a loving dad or a monster in disguise.
Even worse, they may grow up thinking his behaviour is normal or acceptable.
You cannot rescue this man from his alcohol addiction on your own, but you should try convincing him to seek that professional help he so clearly needs.