DEAR CHRISTINE: Unhappily married since getting herpes
I am a 24-year-old mother of two. Until two months ago, I was happily married.
During one of his many overseas trips, my husband contracted Herpes 2. He claims he was under the influence and the woman took “unfair” advantage of him.
I don’t know if I’m more upset that he was not capable of controlling the situation, or the fact he had unprotected sex with a stranger and then with me.
I feel robbed, not only of my trust and the sanctity of our marriage, but also of my dignity, my self-image and my future.
I have decided to stay in this marriage. How could anyone else love me if they knew? How can we put this behind us and have a happy marriage again?
Every time I have an outbreak, I’m reminded of what he did to us. Can you help me to heal my heart – or should I just leave?
You seem to have forgiven your husband and are bent on saving your marriage. That is already a huge part of the problem solved. However, you’ve got a sexually transmitted disease (STD) that you have to live with for the rest of your life.
Marriage counselling would be very helpful to you and your spouse. He behaved irresponsibly, but it doesn’t have to be the end of your marriage.
Other marriages have survived this kind of STD. With work and forgiveness on both of your parts, yours can too.