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I CONFESS: Homewrecker caused my family pain

As told to Sanka Price

I CONFESS: Homewrecker caused my family pain

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If hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, the social media age has invented a whole new way to fan the flames. A website called provides an open forum for women to anonymously shame their husband’s or boyfriend’s alleged mistresses.
Consider it 2013’s answer to “The Scarlet Letter.” Without revealing their own identities, vengeful wives and girlfriends can post rants, with photos, to publicly flog “the other woman” for sleeping with their significant others.
The following is one of the milder letters from that website.
?MY HUSBAND and I had been together for nearly nine years/married for three when my husband had an affair with this [person]. Our children played together, we attended many of the same birthday parties, family functions and so on. We even have a nephew in common. This [person] was practically family herself!
It’s sad to admit that I actually used to think very highly of her before all of this went down. But be warned, she’s a snake in the grass! A sneaky trollop who will smile, socialize and act friendly towards you, meanwhile she’s actually plotting to take your man.
She obviously was well aware [of what she was doing] around a very much married man with three young children at home. Having daughters herself, you’d hope that they would be reason enough for her to set a better example of how a real woman with respectable morals and character doesn’t mess around with a married man. It’s apparent she lacks those traits.
What started as a simple Happy Birthday text evolved into the most excruciatingly painful experience of my life. Their texting continued for weeks, ending with a handful of late night visits to her home that he lied to me about and claimed he was out hunting.
After he went on a few “trips” and never brought anything home, I got suspicious. Not to mention he was acting very off and extremely overprotective of his phone. (Ladies, if it hasn’t been said enough here already, if your man wipes out his text/call history and never lets you touch his phone, please see that as a huge red flag!) My intuition was screaming at me, and with a little sleuthing, I found out the devastating truth.
Our marriage wasn’t perfect and we were going through a very tough time. What long term relationship hasn’t hit a bump or two on the road, though? How incredibly low of her was it to use our marriage’s difficulties to her advantage to seduce my husband? I can only imagine all the “wonderful” things said about me, in addition to the other typical homewrecker bag of tricks she used: ego- boosting/stroking, offering a” listening ear”, and her classiest move – encouraged him to continue smoking (even though he was trying hard to quit) and bought him cigarettes because she knew it was a major source of tension in our marriage (yet she doesn’t even smoke!)
Is she prettier, thinner, or smarter?
No, nope, and obviously not, just your average sad and pathetic infidelity downgrade. The funny part is, a small part of me actually pities the hussy.
How broken must she be, how very little self-worth must she have to allow herself to get involved with another woman’s husband? To be in a relationship that was solely based on lies? How can she respect herself, or be able to look in the mirror without being disgusted, knowing that as a side chick she was really nothing more than an easily disposable piece of trash?
Let’s ponder this; if my husband really wanted to leave me because I’m such a horrible, cold-hearted wife, and if he really loved/cared for her like she thought he did, well then I ask – why did he drop her the moment the affair came to light faster than one drops a load after a drunken fast-food taco binge?  
And when I informed hubby that I’d be outing her on this site, he had absolutely no problem with it at all. The fog has now lifted and he’s able to clearly see what their short-lived affair really was and she, who she really is.
Please keep in mind that my husband is no angel, and is being completely held accountable for his actions. I blame him just as much as her. Had this situation been different and she was someone who had no knowledge of his being a married man, he’d undoubtedly be 100 per cent at fault. He is very aware and ashamed of the biggest and worst mistake he’s made in his life, and is incredibly thankful that I’m even willing to give him a second chance.
Aside from this monumental [mistake], he is still a great provider, fantastic father, and repentant man whom I love very much. We have invested nine years together, have a nice new home, and most importantly three beautiful children who deserve parents who are willing to give it their best to try and work it out. It’s easy to see why she envied my life and stupidly thought she could steal it for herself.
My husband now has to live with all the damage he has created from his incredibly selfish choice. He is paying for it each and every day, trying to make amends with me and our children, only hoping that one day I may find it in my heart to forgive him.
He is doing everything he can, including marriage counselling, wilfully surrendered his privacy and passwords as well as anything else I asked him to do to heal this ugly wound on our marriage.
He’s committed himself to be a better man, father and husband. If he wasn’t able to do these things, or even think about pulling any other kind of [act] like this in the future, you can be damn sure I’ll serve him divorce papers faster than he can remove his favourite member he’ll find super-glued to his leg!