DEAR CHRISTINE: Jealousy driving me crazy
What should I do with a girlfriend whom I love but who is so jealous that I am thinking twice about continuing the relationship?
We have been together for the past year and she gets upset at the slightest thing. If we are somewhere in public and I stop to chat with a female friend, she gets jealous and says I am not being true to her. When I go out to play cricket or enjoy an evening out with the boys, she calls my cellphone frequently to find out where I am, what I am doing and who I am with.
On Christmas Day I called to let her know I could not make it to her house for lunch with her relatives since a cousin had surprised the family by coming home from abroad. Christine, she accused me of having another woman and of wanting to spend the afternoon with this “other woman”.
I told her repeatedly there was nobody else. That day she purposely left her home to visit mine so she could see who was there. When the relative came out of her room, she apologised profusely for intruding. This relative is an elderly woman and I was having lunch with her and other family members from abroad.
The most frustrating moment came when she turned up at my workplace three weeks ago to ask me if I was seeing one of my co-workers.
Christine, I am hoping she will see this letter and realise how annoying her actions and attitude are. I will also ask you this question: Should I call it quits before she does something really drastic? I love her, but I cannot continue living like this.
I agree with you. I, too, would be frustrated.
Your girlfriend obviously does not trust you, perhaps because of past relationships, or maybe she is the type who needs constant reassurance. She also seems to be insecure and perhaps has a low self-esteem.
Invariably, possessiveness kills a relationship. I won’t be surprised if you find the strength to walk away from her. After all, life is too short to be wasted on miserable people.