Dear Christine,
When my husband and I have sex it is great, but most of the time he just kisses me goodnight afterwards, rolls over and goes off to sleep.
I have a very difficult time getting him aroused when this happens. What can I do?
– L.M.
Dear L.M.,
Perhaps you can get to bed earlier, before he is pooped. This may call for some changes in the way you schedule your evenings. This man sounds like a nice one – he is sociable enough and courteous enough to at least kiss you goodnight!
And you can be encouraged since he sometimes will continue to take an interest after one lovemaking episode, according to what you say. Some women complain that their spouses usually have the ingrained bad habit of always turning out like a light after sex.
It seems more likely that your husband is using up his last daily bit of energy as a nightcap. So, he may be agreeable to some improvement like skipping late shows on television. It may surprise you to know that some couples arrange their time in a variety of pleasant ways.
There is freshening up, having a light refreshment and then making love before going out, and again later in the evening. [That takes into account the fact that some men need more time between times.]
There is also the “routine” of getting some sleep and waking up sometime in the night for lovemaking. There is lovemaking in the morning, after a night of rest. This is a good thing to do now and then, so it won’t be such a change in the way you picture or want to have sex.
Simply put, get out of any sexual routine you and your husband may currently have.
– CHRISTINE
