DEAR CHRISTINE: Shotgun wedding backfired on me
I got married because I was pregnant and my parents felt it was the right thing to do.
I supposed it was not fair to blame everything on my parents because I loved my husband and I was happy to be married to him. That joy soon ended when he told me he never really wanted me as a wife.
A second and third child followed and that did not help in any way. My husband started seeing someone else and even had the gall to tell me she was the one he should have married.
My family is now realising the mistake I’ve made, as well as the fact that they did me no good when they pushed me into marriage with this man who also now treats me and the children badly.
They are willing to take me back but I am afraid of what harm will be done to the children who range in ages from one year to five years old.
My husband has refused to be counselled and I am at a loss as to what to make of my marriage.
I am so sorry to hear about your plight. I wish your husband was not so cruel, but the fact is, he is. How could he tell you he wished he had married someone else?
I can also tell that he feels trapped in a marriage he never wanted in the first place.
Marriage is a serious, spiritual commitment and both of you messed up, as well as your parents, who helped force you into taking that step.
Parents should not push children into marriages because of pregnancy. It is one of the worst reasons for getting married.
Right now you need to consider taking your children out of that frightening environment.
There is a possibility that when you leave, he’ll come to miss you and the children – if it happens it happens, but please don’t hold your breath.
If you believe he is the one who should move out, so be it. Let him go instead.