DEAR CHRISTINE: In love with boy back home, not hubby
I am not a bad person, but I am about to make a big decision which will not gain me any popularity points. That’s why I am writing to you because I need your advice.
I am from one of the neighbouring islands and was married to a Barbadian just about two years ago.
I am still very young, and was forced into this marriage by a family member who did not like a guy I was seeing back at home. My husband has a decent job and can take care of me. We have an eight-month-old baby boy together.
I went into the marriage believing that everything would work out but I know now for certain that I am in love with the guy back home, and not with my husband.
I have been communicating with this guy and he feels the same way. In fact, he is also unhappy with his life.
I believe it would be wise for me to end my marriage before it goes any further. I have lost any sexual interest in my husband.
Please, what should I do?
I am not surprised that you have lost a sexual interest in your husband. That could easily have come from having a newborn, plus your desire for your “home-grown” friend.
I don’t think you’ll be doing the right thing to leave your husband – you haven’t even given your marriage a good chance. The grass always looks greener on the other side – at least from a distance. When you get much closer to it you’ll discover its true hue.
Your husband and child must be your priority and you most definitely have to consider what’s best for that young one. He or she will need the loving support of united parents.
Do not be governed by your present longing and feelings for this young man back home – a young man who has become a part of your past. Who is to say that he ever had honourable intentions towards you?
Please, work on your marriage. If you need the help of a counsellor to help you strengthen your marriage, speak to one. I’m sure there are some great times ahead of you – if only you’ll give your marriage a chance.
You’re already in the land of promise. Don’t throw away this opportunity for a new life foolishly.