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I CONFESS: Don’t confuse bad in life with pure evil

Barbados Nation

I CONFESS: Don’t confuse bad in life with pure evil

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This is the story of a man who was abused as a child. Below is Part 2 of that story as he recounts his life.

MY NAME is Nathan (not his real name), and I was abused at the tender age of 13 years old. But before I share the details of this experience there are a few things I need to clarify.

I’ve never been the kind of person to blindly follow the “social norms” of a society. Nor am the kind of person to agree or disagree on a matter just because 10 000 other people do so. My own personal morality and ethicality have always been the motivating factor behind my decision-making. I stand firm in, what I believe in even if I am the only one on this planet who believes in it.

In my own personal opinion, there are a lot of misguided “members of society” who unfortunately live misguided lives full of misguided life-perceptions.

The concept of normality or the definition of normal to most people is that which is usual, expected or accepted amongst a group of people. The interesting thing about it is that normal can be just about anything. In the case of a sexual predator it is normal to abuse children, to lie to themselves in order to rationalise their actions as “okay”. Keep in mind that for them to achieve their goals without having to suffer the consequences, they have to deceive those they come into contact with in such a way that it removes any suspicions.

Sexual predators will attempt to normalise sexual topics and acts by engaging in “light conversation”. This is to make the child feel relaxed about sexuality between themselves and the predator. “Innocent” gestures such as hugging and touching will be executed – a hug that is just a little too close, a touch that lasts just a little too long. Overall, they become very unnecessarily touchy-feely during “moments of celebration” such as when a joke is made.

Grooming is a very well thought out and practised tactic used by sexual predators, on both parents and children to form bonds of emotional attachment. For the child the predator will offer to attend to the needs of that child, whether they are emotional, physical or even psychological. They will give the child special attention and show great affection towards them, and do any and everything possible to gain that child’s utmost trust and respect. All for a single chance or multiple chances to act out their deranged sexual fetishes on them.

These people who consciously practise these acts are at the very least delusional. They don’t only think that their actions are right and okay; they believe it in both body and mind. They surround themselves with like-minded persons. People with these distorted views on life will go to any lengths necessary to achieve an outcome. They will act out some of the most unbelievable and unimaginable acts – even deceive their friends and family into thinking that they are someone other than whom they really are.

Ever since I was a child, or put more correctly, ever since I possessed an unknowing mind or a lack of understanding, I’ve always sought to educate myself, to figure out why this world we live in is so full of chaos, negativity and pain.

Through my own personal turmoil and traumas and understanding of God and man, I think I’ve developed an understanding of why it is the way it is. The world is the way it is because even from the beginning of our time, for some reason man has deemed God’s way of life as not good enough. As a result, man has created his own ways of life, thinking that it is somehow greater when in actuality it is severely less.

In this world there is good, there is bad and there is also pure evil. Some people choose to cower in fear of evil so much that they would rather stand by and do absolutely nothing and choose to believe that the very evil that is destroying their life is nothing but a slight misfortune. That it is just a bad phase. Other people cope by convincing themselves that it is all just a part of life, and that in life you must learn to take the good along with the bad. I agree with this statement, but I think people often confuse the bad of life with pure evil.

I perceive the good things/aspects of life to be things such as true love, true friendship, family, success and in total every single thing that God has planned for our lives. The bad things in life are things such as death only by natural causes, loss of love, failure, natural disasters such as a storm or hurricane, very disappointing circumstances a person may have been born into due to events before their birth. The evil of this world, however, is everything or anything that God did not plan for our lives that:

(1) Severely diminishes the quality of your life

(2) Destroys your life completely

(3) Completely ends/terminates your existence by unnatural means.