Wednesday, April 24, 2024

LOOKA LEW: Sexy and sly too

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IT’S OFFICIAL:  Bajan women are the second sexiest women in the world, losing out only to the women of Armenia.

This is according to the latest survey conducted by Miss Travel, a destination dating website. Bajan women beat out the Americans and even Brazilian women.

But I demand a recount of the votes, ’cause I think that Bajan women are the sexiest women in the whole world and other places.

Now in terms of the sexiest men, unfortunately Bajan men did not make the list. But according to one of my lady friends, if them ever do a survey ’bout who does tell the most lies, Bajan men would be No. 1. But I ain’t getting in that.

What I would say, though, is that apart from being sexy, judging from the stories I heard, Bajan women got to be the trickiest women in the whole world too.

For instance, I heard a old man say he once had a woman, and whenever he asked her for a li’l dividend she was always broke.

He said she encouraged him to open a joint bank account, but in all the years them was together she never put on a cent, all she used to do was draw off.

Anyhow, he said one time he was at home listening to a religious broadcast on radio, and the pastor read a Bible passage that sounded strange to him, so he decided to look it up for himself.

Remembering his woman used to go church so she probably had a Bible in her church bag, he went into her wardrobe, went in the church bag and took out the Bible. When he opened the Bible, two bank books drop out. When he looked at the numbers in them he could not believe his eyes. Unknown to him, she had two bank accounts full o’ money.

He said it had him so shock he forgot ’bout looking up the scripture reading in the Bible. He left food on the stove still cooking, got on his bicycle and rode straight down by the bank and shut down the joint account.

I also heard another story ’bout some men who were at a cricket game, and one fella turned to another one and introduced himself as one of the masons who did work on his girlfriend’s house.

So this man told the mason his girl does live by him and she ain’t building no house. However, the mason fella not only give him the correct name of his girlfriend but described her too.

Anyhow, when he got home he asked her ’bout the house. She laughed it off and said that it belonged to one of her girlfriends and she went up there a couple of times, helping to do some gardening, and a fella asked her if the house was hers and she made a joke and said yes.

Well, he accepted that excuse. Two months later she left him and moved into the same house.

And the last one. A fella told me one time he filled out a form for a competition where one of the prizes was a stove. He said he ain’t got no luck, so he put down his girlfriend’s name, and just so, them won the stove. Anyhow, a couple years later they broke up and she decide to move out with her things. When she was about to put the stove on the truck, he asked her where she was going with his stove, and while putting it into position on the truck she asked him, “Your stove? You win a stove?” See ya.

E-mail: madderic@hotmail.com twitter@madderic

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