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PUDDING & SOUSE: Lawman caught with pants down


PUDDING & SOUSE: Lawman caught with pants down

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THEY ARE SWORN to serve and protect, but a law enforcement officer was caught in the wee hours of the morning only serving – a prostitute – on an infamous hill with bush.

Some early morning joggers came across the lady of the night being held in a bear hug by the lawman, who was still wearing his uniform. The athletes said they were on the verge of springing into action and running to the aid of the officer since it did not appear as though the long arm of the law had the situation fully under control.

But with his marked police vehicle tucked neatly on the pavement, and the red stripe in his pants moving rhythmically, they surmised that he did not appear to need any backup.

Not even the pitter-patter noises of jogging feet could break his hold on this victim of police abuse as he stayed focused on the job at hand as the joggers ran past this arresting moment.

Hit for his life savings

A NON-NATIONAL has wreaked havoc in the life of an unsuspecting wife-seeker.

People in the know tell Pudding & Souse that the woman came up for a vacation on invitation from her Bajan lover and and soon settled in. After noticing that there was a safe in the house, she hatched a plan. Word is that she told him that she had some jewellery and, with the increasing crime rate, she wanted a safe place to put it.

Mr Simple gave her the combination to the safe. His lover then opened the safe and placed her jewellery there, while noticing a large sum of money. She, however, did not touch a cent. After months of secretly opening the safe and counting his cash, she saw the perfect opportunity when his savings reached $42 000.

Residents say she took every cent and bolted back to her hometown, where she is the latest millionaire. They say as a consolation she left the jewellery for him. Mr Simple has not slept since.

Gays making a mess

IN PURSUIT of filthy lucre, some gay men are making a mess after committing vulgar acts near a Christian association.

Workers are fed up with having to pick up used condoms and clean faeces-splattered walls in this City area.

So dire is the situation that workers have been leaving the job the next day after being hired.

Some customers, who have noticed the used condoms, are adamant that they won’t be returning to that parking lot since they run the risk of becoming infected if they step in this mess.

Cussbird now crying

A YOUNG RURAL cussbird who reportedly had a hand in the demise of a close relative recently is now crying and sulking all over the district since her deeds appear to be weighing heavily on her.

The young mother never had a compliment for the kind-hearted matriarch who made sure she had a roof over her head and food on the table and also gave priceless care and counsel to the young ones who were the “apple of her eye”.

Some people in the district are now saying “a little bit too late” after the young mother was spotted on a grave at sunrise. It would appear that she is having trouble sleeping at night and her deeds are coming back to haunt her. Many people in the district are singing the same chorus: “Serves you right!”

Admired for good deed

SOME MEN have no luck with women. And it looks like it is the “good men” who suffer most.

One such man has been left holding two children after his married lover ran out of her home and hopped onto a big yellow vehicle with a driver who has swept her off her feet and caused her to lose all sense of reason.

The unlucky fellow, though, is dutifully filling in as daddy and has accepted responsibility for shepherding his lost lover’s offspring through life.

People in the district are commending him for taking on the big responsibility.