Tuesday, April 23, 2024

PUDDING AND SOUSE: Call him Dr Injection

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A man with a long history in medicinal matters is expecting offspring from his outside woman. The man, who sees himself as God’s gift to women, has been throwing horns in his insecure wife for years now.

His wife, who likes to shuffle paper and waste co-workers’ time shuffling them around when she sees any of them talking to him, is now fully exposed to the realities of life and must now recognise that those she unfaired were not in any way interested in her womanising husband.

P&S has been told that this money-grabber, who is always preceded by a strong odour and the sound of dragging flip-flops, is now – behind the back of his pregnant woman – hounding down a radio-active woman and is offering her the usual package: an apartment and a car for her living pleasure.

Staff say this scoundrel should take time to look after himself and spend some of his big bucks on a good mouthwash and dental floss to obviate the need for them to duck when he is speaking to them.

His wife, who, of late, is unable to cope with all the stress, is home recuperating from a bout of discomfort and this may only add to her stress since the medicine man is now going full pelt in his old age.

A shoot-first policy

A BIG-UP INSURANCE MAN WITH A GUN has fired some warning shots across the bow of a man whose policy it is to cook appetising meals in the kitchen.

The head honcho has pulled out all the stops and is getting all the assistance he can muster to stave off a horn. Some men who drive buses say they can no longer keep their eyes on the roads and also in back alleys to see if they spy any suspicious activities, though the package offered is tempting.

Hot on the heels of holding some hand for stepping out recently, he still does not seem to have learnt his lesson, and is now set on reeling back in one of his many women who has gone astray with a chef.

But P&S has been told that the chef is starting to cower and feels that walking around with kitchen utensils after he is finished working is no match for this violent short man who is gunning for him.

No leg to stand on

A WOMAN whose son was caught red-handed in a compromising position has sworn that he did not go along willingly.

She is adamant that he was bullied into performing the disgusting act and she wants answers. Though the boy has admitted to consenting to the act and that all allegations were indeed true, his mother has sworn that they are false.

The mother, a well known streetwalker – who has been in a state of denial for years, says that based on where her son was taken no one could have easily known that they were at that location and therefore someone must have ratted on him.

The boy, however, says that he was not lying, that as a matter of fact they were both standing when they were caught, but mum, who was not there, insists that something is afoot.

Her son agrees that something is afoot and has given mum his word that that was the cause of him unwittingly giving away his position to the watchman.

Dirty picture indeed

A zoom man who would not stop interfering with people of the same sex has gone and troubled a little secondary schoolboy, whose mother found out and has taken the matter to the men in blue.

 The click-click man, who can often be seen rushing up Barbarees Hill heading to the new city past Spooners Hill, is now relaxing in a land far afield, not knowing that his dirty deals have been reported on this occasion. Not one cares about his preferences, except that he does not understand that approaching minors is downright wrong.

Not even if he wears hair which is not his will he be able to slip back into this fair land undetected, as he is simply not small enough to fall below the radar.

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