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WILD COOT: Polyamory

HARRY RUSSELL, [email protected]

WILD COOT: Polyamory

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THERE SEEMS TO BE total confusion in the church these days. Probably there always was, with some people speaking in tongues and getting into the ‘power’. One set of United States ilk is inclined to admit the new sex wave, while the others, steeped in African and Asian mores, would have none of it. However, the Caribbean compromisers, especially Barbados, would rather stay in between – a position that we like. The world is changing. We ask, for the better?

Our esteemed Prime Minister is on record for saying, “There will be no same-sex marriages in Barbados”. Probably this will hold good under his administration. However, there is nothing to foretell what can happen under a different administration. What was agreed recently in London is a compromise that has wide implications – money-wise as well. This can be interpreted not as the thin edge of the wedge, but a further intrusion into an ever-widening hole. Just as Third World countries are being forced to tow the line and conform economically, even so habits taking off in the First World countries will rule the roost.

Young people are changing the world with their new language that is computer driven, young people are changing the world with their new style of dress, young people are changing the world with their new style of dance and music. Why not with their new meaning of religion? Furthermore, the number of atheists is increasing. There is confusion anyhow. One group endorses the cutting off the head of heretics and non-believers. The other is willing to forgive and conjoin with gays, lesbians and in-betweens. 

We old people seem destined to inhabit this earth for a long time so that we can pay for our sins while being subjected to the inability to enjoy the changing scenes of life. Listening to Steve Harvey the other afternoon, the Wild Coot came across an amazing concept now coming into vogue in the United States and perhaps soon legally practised in Barbados. You know that since the justices in the US confirmed same-sex marriages, there has been an agitation in our fair land to follow suit. Apparently a ménage à trois is to be called a polyamory. The example that was on display was a household consisting of a man and two apparent lesbians. One woman was a mother of two young children while the children were to call the other woman auntie. Asked if the families of the trio were happy with the arrangement, they confirmed that their families were happy as long as they had found love. There was no thought given to the laws laid down almost 6 000 years ago by the Jews in the books of Leviticus and Deuteronomy.

The Wild Coot was tempted to write to Dear Christine and solicit her views on this new household arrangement, but on second thoughts he realised that what was being portrayed on the screen was child’s play in comparison to what seems to be an established practice in Barbados. Remember it is said that in order to pay bills, some women have a Monday man, a Tuesday man, a Wednesday man, a Thursday man and a Friday man. Saturday is for shopping and Sunday for going to church and rest.

Here were two lesbians and an apparently straight man. Could the term polyamory apply also to two men and a woman? Whereas in the proffered example of the two women, when the man was unavailable or surfeited, they could be happy with themselves, one raises the question of what would happen if the two men were straight and the woman for some unknown reason was unavailable. Come for your world!

One thing we learned from the television interview was that there was harmony in the home and that they slept in a king-sized bed with the man in the middle. Do we have to fear that such an arrangement can catch fire in Barbados? Our females of the species, as can be read in Dear Christine, hardly like to share even when they do not know the identity of the suspect woman. On the other hand, we live in a world of changing values and our young people seem to be moving with the times. One thing, it may solve the complaints of those ladies who raise their frustration of not being able to find a male partner. They could settle for ménages à trios rather than a yearning celibacy.

• Harry Russell is a banker. Email [email protected]