I ALMOST THREW UP when I read about the vomit comment made by Prime Minister of Trinidad and Tobago, Dr Keith Rowley. In case you missed it, that could mean that you may be suffering from morning sickness and vomiting is simply a run-of-the-mill thing for you these days. Or you just may not have had a chance to read the papers, listen to radio or turn on the television. It was all over Facebook too. Not the vomit, but the story.
Here’s the lowdown in a nutshell: said prime minister now has a new car. A Mercedes S-Class Benz. I know these cars not cheap – ask Ian Daniel or any of the executives at Simpson Motors and they will tell you. But the rationale presented to the people is this: “I need a new car because Kamla vomited all over the old one and it reeks.” Okay, well, those are not his exact words, but that is the deduction, based on the fact that the prime minister said the vomit stains and smell were too much to bear.
Was it beer that caused the ostensible vomit stains? We really don’t know. In fact, were there vomit stains and odours in the first place? This is what he said. But who checked it? How certain was the PM that these were indeed vomit stains and not something else? I mean, some Coke fell onto my blouse the other day; and when it dried you may have thought that I had a malt or a frutee. But it was Coke. So, how does one verify the stain and smell of vomit?
You’ve vomited before, right? More than once? Did each vomit session give off the same stench? Sometimes people have “ghost” vomit. That is, they vomit and it doesn’t smell. Suppose a past owner ghost-vomited in your car . . . you wouldn’t even know! Nonetheless, Prime Minister Rowley states that the vomit stench is a pungent one, so the people of that country must buy him a new car.
Look, I know a millionaire. Let’s just call him Vic. One of his staff members wasn’t feeling well and he was doing the good deed of taking her home. Mid-trip, she pukes on the plush periphery of his luxury SUV. You think Vic said: “Nah boy, I ain’t able with this vomit thing; I got to get a whole new car”? No, he had to clean it up and get a valet done. I had to take a ride in said SUV and to tell you the truth, I would have never known of the episode if he didn’t tell me about it.
So there you go: a $150 valet versus a half-a- million-dollar car. But then again, the goodly PM did mention that the suspension was aching his back, too. Right.
It is said that you can rationalise almost anything in this world, but you can’t always justify it.
