Thursday, March 28, 2024

RON IN COMMON: Getting to the bottom of it

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HAVE YOU noticed the rising derrieres of so many of our women? Maybe, the plump butts are linked to too much drinking and eating, especially steroid-filled chicken and an array of processed foods.

Or it may have something to do with the clothes they are wearing, because whether the women are skinny, of average size or big and bold, their curvy backsides stand out, or even hang out as Shirley Stuart and the Escorts would have sung years ago.   

Thankfully, we have not heard Bajan women resorting to unusual methods to develop their hips as has apparently been happening in Jamaica. Some women there are said to be eating chicken pills and pellets, the same ones designed to fatten up chickens in the 90 days before the slaughter.

Unfortunately, the intended booty boost has turned up in the wrong places, with some of them reported to be experiencing enlarged breasts and thighs.

There is danger in trying to compete with or look like either Kim Kardashian or Nicki Minaj. So, being the women they are, I know Bajan woman are steering clear of silicone injections to get that all important rise. I doubt very much our dear ladies are in anyway influenced by the looks of Jennifer Lopez or Serena Williams, who have both caused jaw dropping looks and “wow” reactions to their butts.  Surely, not even the slick advertising or the gossip shows from North America that now so easily penetrate our homes will entice our ladies to resort to “mock implants” to extend the size of their bottoms. Tell me I’m right.

The truth is that the Barbadian belles must have got their inheritance from our ancestors somewhere in Africa which is why it is going to be important to trace the lineage and do some DNA testing.

In Nigeria and Kenya, there is an obsession with the big butt. The word from those countries is that the men, whether Christians or Muslim, admire this feature of their women.

It is evident that there is a big butt pandemic which has captured the interest and imagination of many women.

Just reflect on Kadooment Day during Crop Over festival and the picture becomes very clear.

Perhaps we need to ask historians Trevor Marshall and DR Pedro Welch about this phenomenon as their studies may have highlighted certain things about the women from Africa and their descendants here, although care must not be taken to restrict this “big butt” to people of African descent only.

Perhaps, Peter Wickham and his team at CADRES, may have to be commissioned to research this big butt social evolution. And since CADRES has good knowledge of most of the Caribbean, it should do a ranking of the nations on this matter.

Even before any survey results, historians’ reports or DNA results, I’ll bet that Barbados has a high ranking. Perhaps we should have an online vote on www.nationnews.com and should even get a reaction from MPs. It may also make sense to get David Ellis and John Lovell to dedicate one of their call-in radio programmes to the issue.

Don’t steupse. It would make for interesting discussion and we may neither be perplexed nor baffled at the end of it all because we may have the answers to an issue which sometimes causes a second view.

By the way, look around your office, in your church, in the supermarket at your school or even in the bus stand to see whether you agree or disagree.

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