DEAR CHRISTINE: Wary of my past mistake
DEAR CHRISTINE, I AM TO BE married to a man from . . . whom I met on my holidays. Ours is a strange love for it was not until after I returned home that this man told me in a letter how much he admired and cared for me.
He is some years my senior and a very sedate person. Since older men always appealed to me I was also attracted to him. But because he seemed such a reserved type I did nothing while we were together to show my feelings.
We have become very close through our letters to each other and I wonder if you would consider it wise, knowing the kind of “correct” person he is, to tell him of a mistake I made with a boy when I was somewhat younger. I later discovered I never cared for him.
As a matter of fact, it was after having sex with him that caused us to break up. I did not want to go on in that way since I realised I did not care all that much for him. He left me when he could not have his own way. What do you think?
I honestly do not feel there’s anything to gain in digging up the past, especially, as it is one you regret. I am sure that your fiancé is not all that “correct” and like you he also has a past life.
It would be an exercise in futility to swap experiences. I really cannot see any worthwhile purpose in having him recount his past and vice versa. I wish you both happiness.