DEAR CHRISTINE: Bad treatment after ten years
I HAVE BEEN with a man for the past ten years. I have always been loyal to him and still am. I tried my best to make everything go right, but he is still neglecting me for another woman who has children that are not his. I have four children for him and he does not give me any money as he goes to the supermarket himself.
This woman has told him to put me out of the house, but he told her that would be putting out his children. To this, she told him he could not mind the children, that he has to get away from me and she is going to help him. I asked him about all this and he says that it is a lie and he only has one woman.
He goes home at this girl and her family, and takes my children with him. His family and I get along well but he gets vex with me because I go to them and whenever I can, I do things for them.
Despite his unfaithfulness I am pleased that he still has some regard for the children, in that he is not prepared to turn you and them out of the house.
Still, that is not enough. You may have to start thinking of doing something for you and your children – something like living and living happily at that.
After ten years of loyalty and not even a wedding band to show for it, do you think you are getting the best deal? I doubt very much that you are.
I believe some men are glad to have wives and mistresses of long standing for when these other women come along. They can always give them the bait of “I’d come with you but I’ve got children”, or “I can’t leave my wife since I’ve no real case against her”.
The free and easy woman is held because of these apparently genuine excuses. That man cares for his children and maybe in his own peculiar way he cares for you too.