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No stopping distance


MICHAEL RUDDER

No stopping distance

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MANY OF US are aware that driving on our roads requires or should require all to have some stopping distance between us and the vehicle ahead. We also know that too often, especially on the ABC Highway, some (*^%*#) person sees that space and ‘drops into it’, thus negating our stopping distance.

Using that analogy, one has to wonder why the minister responsible for planning, the Right Honourable Prime Minister, seems happy to allow, not one but two “vehicles” to occupy his ‘stopping distance’.

There was Minister Dr David Estwick with his molasses tanks – heavy; then Minister Michael Lashley with Coverley houses so close together that the malodorous fumes from one may be detected in the next; and did the same minister also ‘pull into the space’ and agree that the bush might be cleared and structures built for a better view of racing vehicles in St Philip – not on the highway? Wow!

Was the Prime Minister singing the nursery rhyme ‘Empire Theatre is falling down . . .’ to the tune ‘London Bridge is Falling Down’ when in the space zipped Minister Stephen Lashley in a truck with a big sign – Beer Garden Here. Wuh loss!

Just when the Prime Minister thought that was all, the heavy rumble of a massive vehicle startled him as Minister Donville Inniss waved as he passed with a load of big hard rocks. The Minister for planning could clearly see on the tailgate a sign which read – Get Your Rock Hard Now; Only five per cent duty.

The Prime Minister rubbed his eyes and was about to slam on the brakes in each case, but then the person sitting next to him rang two bells, one gold the other silver, and chimed in with: ‘Mark my words, I did not have to get permission, ring, ting ,ting . . . .’

“Braderax!” The Prime Minister jumped up ‘pressing the brakes’.

It was only a dream but there was no stopping distance. No stopping distance – no accountability from his ministers. Bruga-dung!

– MICHAEL RUDDER

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