DEAR CHRISTINE: Mind and soul belong to my ex
DEAR CHRISTINE, I was in love with a man who treated me very badly. He lied and cheated and that cut me inside out.
Then came B who rescued me. He made it clear from the start that he does not give women money. I did not mind because I was working.
It was hard to get serious with him because I was a year older than he was. Anyhow, after a year passed, I let go and gave him my body, heart and soul. We seemed compatible in many ways. We also promised to be frank with each other.
He came to my house five days a week and I grew more and more devoted to him. I gave him the best of everything I had, but he always played cheap.
We were together for three years but last year, I noticed a change. If I called his home, he would answer very abruptly or his sister would say he is not at home or wrong number.
He also says if I become pregnant, I would have to destroy it. I’ve tried to show him how we could work as a team but he says I have a wild imagination. Things got worse as he never had time for my calls.
After a while, I met a man five years older than I am who is looking for a serious woman to settle down with. After giving it some thought, I decided to accept his friendship.
I told B we were through as lovers. However, he kept in touch, asking me to do this or do that for him. He would spend hours with me on the phone but when I told him I was pregnant, he stopped calling me. My other boyfriend stuck with me.
He gives me and the baby everything we need. He is so devoted to me. We lack nothing. Nobody has ever treated me so nicely yet.
But I do not love him. My mind and soul are on B. I cannot help myself.
You must know by now that you are giving your body, heart and soul to an uncaring person who has nothing to offer you or your child.
On the other hand, there is this kind, caring gentleman who at least deserves some loyalty. If, however, you are so against him, it would not be fair to keep taking from him while you hanker after the one who cares only about himself, not you or your child.
Try really hard to see the futility of any worthwhile relationship with Mr B. I hope it won’t be long before you realise that life can be truly happy without him.