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WILD COOT: I told you so

HARRY RUSSELL, [email protected]

WILD COOT: I told you so

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MORE AND MORE EVIDENCE is emerging to corroborate my assertion that present mankind evolved from the common snail. Protest as much as you may that such a humble (and smelly) origin can account for our being on planet earth, your cries are in vain.

Just experience how some people smell when they have not bathed for days and the argument done. And look around you daily. Don’t you see people right now, millions of years after the beginning of that evolution that have not shown any departure, have not shown any deviation from the ancient mould or mole.

I told you a while ago that Charles Darwin was on to something; and the Anglican Church recently had to apologise to him. Thus putting a different slant on the Good Book. Certain people must now apologise for perpetuating such a theory – although it really gave order to our way of living and instilled hope in our daily lives.

The Wild Coot has suffered daily since the day he first advanced this theory – his effort to shed light on the behaviour of certain of our fellowmen. Certain good folk have taken the trouble of predicting the final resting place of his soul. They have suggested that burning in hell without mercy. What I did admire was the beauty of the language of their emails.

Full of conduplicatio: ‘Wild Coot, you will burn in hell; Wild Coot, your soul will burn forever; Wild Coot, your earthly body will burn and not disintegrate, you will burn like in a furnace’.

They used anaphora: ‘Wild Coot, hell will be a blessing for you’; Wild Coot, hell will welcome you; Wild Coot, hell will be too good for you’: or even mesodiplosis: ‘Wild Coot, what good will those articles serve you?; Wild Coot, will those articles serve you down there?; Wild Coot, you should keep those articles and read them to the devil’. Such obloquy!

All because I stated that we come from snails; that we passed through the stage of a monkey. Some of us have not quite completed the process of evolution as can be seen by the inept decision-making process. The most recent findings occurred a few days ago while crawling through an almost inaccessible hole in a cave.

Skeletons dating back millions of years were found in a prehistoric state of underdevelopment. The head was small, also the brain; there was evidence of development of human finger and teeth. Such a comparison of this stage development can even be seen in the world – even in Barbados (throw back).

Mark you, the decisions that are presently made are evidence of a deficit in logical thinking. I mean how can you place a tax on the pension investment that has come about as a result of earnings net of taxation? In fact, what is left is subject to further taxes from value added tax on food, hospitalisation and so on.

Welcome is the news that one more piece of the evolutionary puzzle seems to have been found a few days ago. We listen with bated breath.

Yes, we know that people will continue to profess that they are intimate with the mind of God and to talk with Him like Moses who had to take off his sandals while doing so as the bush was burning – a most illogical arrangement.

The Wild Coot does not have truck with such beliefs. Each society had its own rules and regulations so as to bestow order with their people. So has our society, and the biblical teachings serve an exceptional purpose no thanks to the Jews.

I also told you that things were not going right at the Central Bank. Week after week I kept saying that the direction was wrong, iniquitous to the interest of Barbadians.

There was the failed guarantee invitation, there was the call to give direct loans, there were the mountain Red Sea and bank losses, there was the difference in outlook between the commercial banks and the Central Bank, there was the lengthening distance between bank and media, there was the incestuous relationship with Government.

Oh, who is going to repay those 5.5 per cent bonds in 2020?

That report on Page 8A of September 6 in the NATION is not saying a pang if truly analysed.