DEAR CHRISTINE, For the past 12 years I have lived with a man I love very much. Whenever I asked him, he would say he loved me too. During this period he has left me several times to go back to his mother.
Once he took me with him and I did not find her very nice. He also does a little trading and so this keeps him away from time to time.
But, Christine, I only recently learned that he has a steady woman there who his mother knows about and likes,. That is why she was cold to me.
Now the whole story is out, I learnt that he had taken her on holidays. It seems this woman does not mind him having another woman but I cannot live that kind of life, especially as he is staying away more and more and not being as nice to me as he used to.
This thing is giving me headaches all the time. I feel like some old slipper that has been cast off even though I am just 30.
Do you think he will ever come back to me as he did once long ago?
R
Dear R:
I would be giving you wind to hold if I told you I believe this man will come back to you as he did when you first met. He has been freelancing too long to change and from what you have told me he is drifting away as time goes by.
At 30 you are certainly far from being an old cast-off slipper. If you are unhappy (and I don’t see you being otherwise) and unwilling to accept the present relationship, try to be brave and remember that there are still good things in life.
I am sure that if you decide to leave him to the other woman in time the pain will ease and you will know happiness again.
I don’t see why after 12 years you should be in the position you are in with him. Wake up and smell the roses. Don’t you think you deserve better? I think you do.
CHRISTINE
