DEAR CHRISTINE: Never thought I’d fall for him
DEAR CHRISTINE, Through no fault of mine, I lost my husband to another woman four years ago. For peace’s sake, I gave him the divorce he asked for, as the girl was expecting a baby for him. We never had children.
After the divorce, although he reached a settlement, I went to work at . . . .
Three months ago a man started coming there for lunch. We made friends and I learnt a lot about him.
It was not until we started going out, however, that I knew he was married and I have always said I would never go out with a married man.
Our happiness is spoilt by our guilty feelings, for we know that if she ever finds out, it will hurt her.
I can tell that the present secrecy and deception are causing you some discomfort of the mind. I doubt you would be happy if the situation was brought to light, thus causing grief to the wife.
You would not be happy if another broke up your marriage, so think carefully before you break up someone else’s.
It will hurt to give this man up but if you do not stop seeing him, you and his wife will both be hurt. After only knowing him for a few months you said you cannot imagine what life would be like without him,
Don’t you think it’s going to be so much harder for the wife, who spent considerably more time with him in the past and who perhaps hopes to spend her whole lifetime with him?
You will never be truly happy about another’s misery. Not you of the sensitive conscience.