Friday, April 26, 2024

DEAR CHRISTINE: Wandering eye causing worry

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Dear Christine,
My husband and I have just returned from a holiday with our daughter. She and her husband are friends with some very nice people in the same apartment building.
There are three couples and a single woman.
 Just before we left, I was becoming quite upset because my husband, who is nearly 60, was showing a lot of interest in this single woman. I think if he were given a chance he would have carried on with her.
However, I kept my eye on them and made a point of not staying home on any of the outings that were arranged for us – even if I felt tired.
I expect you’ll tell me to forget it, but I am finding it very difficult to do so. This thing is bothering me so much that if I do not talk to someone, I will go out of my head.
It’s possible this same woman will be coming to Barbados to spend a holiday later this year. Do you think I am worrying unduly?
– MRS B.
Dear Mrs B.,
I think you are, and the only way not to go out of your head is not to make any fuss about all this. Marriage never prevents anyone from wandering if they choose to, and I’m sure you must have seen and admired things about other men, without considering being unfaithful to your husband.
Would you say that your husband has always been faithful and that he is committed to you? If the answer is yes, then you should not be so concerned about his interest in this woman – whatever you perceive it to be. Do you trust your husband at all?
It could be that because this woman is single, everyone was trying to draw her into the circle of the couples. It does not mean, therefore, that your husband has a personal interest in her or that he loves you less. However, if you are overly bothered, discuss the matter with your husband. He’ll probably be “tickled pink” that you’re jealous.
And, please, do not work yourself into a panic over the intended visit. You may even find yourself enjoying her company, if you only look beyond the jealous feelings that currently exist.
– CHRISTINE

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