Dear Christine,
I AM IN LOVE with a married man who says how much he loves me. But how does he show this?
He only sees me when I can arrange the meeting. During those times, we make love and then he is up and gone until the next day when he calls me two or three times.
I have asked him on many occasions to let us stop what is going on, but he says he cannot stop because he loves me a great deal.
He has never in the two years that we have been together given me a gift, a Christmas card or sent me a birthday card. We’ve never even had lunch or dinner on special occasions.
I have three children and I am not so bad off that I need him to support me. However, a little gift would help.
Don’t you think if he loved me, he would make some time to see me?
My husband passed away six years ago and he is the only person I have known intimately since then, although I have had other suitors.
When we are together I feel really happy and he makes me feel good.
What do you think is the best thing for me to do?
– MISS C
Dear Miss C,
I’m glad you asked that question and I hope you are prepared for the answer.
You must leave him alone; end the relationship and return this man to his wife.
Judging from all you’ve written, it appears to me that there is very little in this affair for you.
As important as sex is, you need companionship; tiny tokens of affection and the like. He is not fulfilling these things in your life, just offering you occasional sex and running back to his love nest at home. Do you honestly think you deserve this kind of treatment? Indeed not!
I think you should widen your circle of friends and date other people who are unattached, without making a commitment until you are absolutely sure you’re getting a fair deal in the relationship.
It is not going to be easy getting him out of your life, but seeing other people should provide you with the strength and courage you’ll need.
I am certain that you cannot be at peace knowing that you are contributing to the pain of another woman – his wife.
Take that initial step to end the relationship and stop waiting for him to do so.
Right now, nothing is working in your favour.
– CHRISTINE
