I trust that my testimony will help those who feel there is no hope in their empty relationships.
A word of caution to such individuals: if the relationship is draining you, then it is best that you get out. However, if you are strong in the Lord as I have become over the past ten years, then you will be able to withstand the brunt of your partner’s abuse and watch as he/she becomes more drained than you who he/she is trying to destroy.
Read on as I reveal an excerpt from the Book Of My Life, which I am in the process of compiling.
The person “D” with whom I have been sexually involved for the past 23 years, during 14 of which we have been a married couple, now grunts, growls and curses when I attempt civil conversation.
D has tried various things to get me to move out of the house, including bringing others of the opposite sex to the house and seeking to embarrass me in front of them. He has also brought his family, acquaintances and my friends and tried to make me look bad in front of these people. He does this by calling me extremely disparaging names such as whore and lesbian when I talk to male or female friends, respectively. It seems he can’t make up his mind which one I am (LOL).
He went so far as to put my things out of the house at one time, and on more than one occasion even locked me out when I went out. Years ago, when this happened, I cried and begged D to open the door – but not now. I cannot bother about this behaviour anymore because I have more serious issues to deal with in my everyday life and they take priority.
Yes, I am still with D and to this day when I leave the house to perform my labour of love, I always try to return at approximately 9 p.m. If I am going to be slightly later because of unforeseen circumstances, I will call but D refuses to answer the phone, telling me I do not pay for it, so answering my call is his decision. That is true, but why should I pay for his phone; I already pay for mine, along with other things.
If D has an ounce of honesty in him he will admit that I was never dependent on him for anything, and I care about nothing he owns because I have always held a good-paying job. Besides that, I have investments from which I withdraw funds to offer my tithes and offerings.
These leave me with enough to live on daily and support another’s cause. God has really been good to me and I can’t help but mention it here and publicly in my daily life.
One thing I know is that while D’s behaviour is crippling him spiritually, morally, physically and financially, it is strengthening me in the same areas. I can only continue to pray that he stops being Satan’s servant and become one of God’s heirs because no matter what he tries to do to me it rebounds on him and cripples him further.
He continues to be continually angry, mean and swearing at the top of his voice and I have gone silent about this behaviour because he curses more and louder. It is as if he is spiritually deaf and blind, and only God can reverse this.
The message to any abused spouse is to take hope and serve God fervently, no matter what anyone says to you or about you, because rest assured about this: God has a way of working out everything that you are worried about.
So, don’t be discouraged and don’t you ever doubt that God has a way of working it out.
