Dear Readers,
In the August 27 DAILY NATION readers were invited to respond to the letter under the headline Nothing I Do Turns Hubby On, which was written by W.
Here are some of the responses.
[You gave her] excellent advice, Christine!
A good sit-down talk with your husband is the first step. You deserve truth and honesty. Assuming everything is fine with you – that you look good, smell good and are doing your part to keep the romance flowing (which by all accounts you are) – what he is doing amounts to robbery and is not fair to you. Alienation of affection is more than a good reason for divorce.
Four kisses in 14 years? And you settled for that? He must be a really bad kisser.
It seems that this is not a new problem. You have every right to demand that he see a doctor just to be sure that he is physically well.
The average man is way too proud to admit he may have a sexual problem. You say you know he has a woman. Maybe he does; maybe it’s just smoke and mirrors, but you seem cool with that, and you shouldn’t be.
I think that maybe your problem is not a lack of sex, but rather a lack of openness, honesty and communication in your marriage.
I’s time that you both seek the professional counselling you need. If he refuses, you’ve been robbed enough and it might be time to find a more willing partner.
A good marriage involves much more than what you are currently experiencing. Sexual frustration should never be involved. I hope things work out in your favour.
– D. STOUTE
To hubby on, keep your clothes on.
– CARL HARPER
Wow, lady, I wish my wife was that motivated. I’d suggest that you go on strike. No cooking, no cleaning, no nothing until you get some good sugar.
– DIRTY OKRA
Honey, the walking around naked thing will have the reverse effect. If he is not willing to talk about it or see someone, I can’t see any workable short- or long-term solution. It’s a pity; one partner should never be in a position where he or she is sexually starved.
– MR PSYCHOTIC
I would suggest you ask him if he wants to stay married . . . just get to the point. There is no need to beat around the bush.
– BERTHIA
What are you waiting around for? You’ve tried everything and nothing has worked. Ask for a divorce and start a new life.
This man is inconsiderate and selfish. In addition, I believe you’ve already given him much of your time and energy. Four kisses in 14 years says a lot about love and affection and you should not have to beg him for sex. Not even the prostitutes do that.
– SMART PANTS
In the letter it was stated that your husband only has sex with you twice a month and for that to happen you have “to quarrel” in order to get him to do so. This is pathetic! Get out of this so-called marriage.
Also, stop cooking, washing and looking after him immediately! Keep your clothes on and make sure that when he comes home at night you’re out with some girlfriends enjoying life.
In other words, get a life for yourself; you honestly do not have one with your so-called husband. What a shame!
– J. LAYNE
This is one of the saddest stories I’ve heard in a long time – a wife having to quarrel to get her husband to have sex with her. This cannot be fun at all. How can you then enjoy intercourse with each other?
You also say your husband has another woman. If this is true, you should not be having intercourse with him at all. Heaven knows what he will bring home to you.
My advice: get a divorce and start a fresh life. You sound like a nice person who deserves happiness.
– MARK MY WORD
