DEAR CHRISTINE: Kind, loving, but he’s separated
My friend recently met the most kind and loving man, but there is one problem. He is still married, even though he is separated from his wife and lives alone.
What is your opinion on dating someone who is separated? It seems wrong to me. If the marriage is bound for divorce, why not wait a little while until it’s final?
It also seems cowardly to test the waters before it’s official, and dangerous to the person who’s dating someone who happens to be separated. Couldn’t they always change their mind and go back? Wouldn’t dating someone else jeopardize the settlement?
– Seeking Answers
Dear Seeking Answers,
You’ve touched on a rather delicate subject because separations can at times be filled with raw emotions.
The two individuals must now endure single life while hoping/working for reconciliation, or holding their breath in the hope that a vindictive soon-to-be-ex won’t find excuses to return to court.
Dating under these circumstances would indeed be less than astute.
Yet we must admit that some marriages have been over long before the actual filing of divorce papers.
I believe therefore that dating has its place during a legal separation process. What one should avoid, if possible, is getting sexually involved with the “soon-to-be-divorced” individual. Until the divorce becomes final, the individual is still legally married.