Dear Christine,
I am 49 years old with a 62-year-old husband. We have sex every day but I have been wondering if such frequent sex is harmful to a man.
He suffers from minor ailments, nothing that he has to worry too much about, but I often wonder if his heart will continue to stand the strains of daily sexual intercourse.
Do you think I am worrying unnecessarily? Do you think it is too much sex for a man his age?
– C.P.
Dear C.P.,
First let me assure you that what is good for the goose is not always good for the gander. I say that to say there will be 62-year-old healthy men and 62-year-old unhealthy men, so to judge your husband solely based on his age is not the right thing to do.
Now let’s see. Women readers around the country may be laughing with a slightly bitter edge and saying to you: “You do not have a problem at all, girl.” In fact, you may the envy of every female reader today and some men may be wondering if they need to step up to the plate.
All I can say is if you hear no complaints from your husband, it is doing him no harm to have sex every day and you are lucky to have him.
The only difficulty would be if either one of you should feel fatigued or pressured to keep up this daily pleasure. If this ever comes to pass, bear in mind that less often can still be very enjoyable, and that if one partner wants to take it easy sometimes and just give pleasure to the other, that should be considered a pleasant alternative.
It happens now and then that it is the woman who wants sex less frequently than the man. The reasons for this vary. Some people think less often is better, with more anticipation and less routine making it so. A woman may express this by saying she worries that her lover is overdoing it.
A 62-year-old man may very well find daily sex well within his capacity, while a 30-year-old may find it too frequent. Neither has to be an oddity; after all, sex drives vary from person to person.
If you yourself would prefer less frequent sex, discuss it with your husband. Suggest that sometimes you would simply like to just give him pleasure and that doing so would be a special pleasure to you.
If at any time you begin to resent the daily bout of sex, you will start thinking of ways to avoid sex and even to avoid your husband. Spouses have to be in agreement about sex. So again, if he is not complaining and you’re okay with your daily dose of sexual pleasure, simply enjoy it and stop the worrying.
– CHRISTINE
