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I CONFESS: Money can’t buy love


BARBADOS NATION

I CONFESS: Money can’t buy love

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OVER A YEAR AGO I met a lovely young woman who was a final-year law student. I am 20 years older, but believe me, she is very mature, loving and caring for her age.

I was divorced about ten years ago and have been single ever since. I am a university graduate who has travelled and lived in a number of countries as a result of my work; and over the years, I’ve met many women from all walks of life, races, and cultures – but never one like this woman.

Two months later, we confessed our love for each other.

I made a downpayment on a car that I had planned to give to her when we got married. She knew this. And over the course of the past year, I bought her expensive gifts such as brand name shoes, bags, a BlackBerry phone and jewellery. I also promised to buy her other gifts after she had finished her studies.

By the way, she never asked for any of this. I just felt it was natural for me to do this for her because of my love for her. In fact, I had never done such things in my entire life for any other woman.

Around the middle of the year, she said many sweet and romantic things to me. Then in the beginning of her new semester, my instincts told me that she was about to cheat on me: she became overly sensitive and constantly hid calls and text messages from me.

When I confronted her, however, she strongly denied that there was someone else.

Transformed into a cold person

But by the last week of that September, I could no longer stand the pain. She had changed from a very romantic and caring person into a cold, indifferent one – and she didn’t even realise it.

I also realised that her attention and feelings were focused on another young man who attended some of the classes she did. When I questioned her about him, she continued to deny any romantic feelings, always saying that they were just normal friends.

But I didn’t believe her and eventually got a printout of her phone’s activity, and discovered that during those same months when she had been saying such sweet things to me, she had been sleeping with another guy! There were as many as 30 calls and 20 to 25 text messages between them in a single day!

And yet, she still denied that they were more than just best friends. Only a fool would believe something like that!

When I returned from an overseas trip later that month she called me and asked to meet up again. She promised me that she would turn over a new leaf and asked for another chance to prove herself after realising that I was the man for her and that she “couldn’t bear losing” me.

So we went on a brief overseas trip to celebrate my birthday, and I had a wonderful time. And she was really a sweet angel during that time.

But I waited for the October phone bill, and found out that she had called and sent text messages to the same guy during the weekend we had been off the island. Physically, she had been with me but her soul and spirit certainly weren’t. What a liar!

It baffles me why women nowadays are so hard to please. We never used to quarrel, had lots of fun, and seemed to be having great sex – yet, she had feelings for someone else all along. Is it because I’m so much older?

When my first girlfriend left me when I was in my early 20s, I felt hurt but I could understand it because I was poor at that time and she wanted someone who could offer her better. But in W’s case, I cannot understand at all because I can offer her the moon and the stars while the other man – a youngster – is poor.

I really must be nothing more than an idiot to think that money can buy love. The expensive gifts and promises of flashy cars were simply not enough.

Perhaps she was never the right woman for me.

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