THE MINISTER of Culture is one of my favourite guys. I remember co-anchoring the 5:30 edition of The Latest from Starcom Network News with him when he made a guest appearance. This was just behind David Ellis’ Six Thirty.
The one thing I don’t understand is why he recently skirted the issue of skimpy stylings – or, as he put it, “nippy” costumes. I mean, Minister Lashley has a way of speaking that could charm the pants off anyone, so…why sit on the fence with this one? (Apparently, his earlier days as a broadcaster have moulded him into one of the more comfortable and skilled speakers behind a microphone.)
Now, I’m making a blanket statement here, not cloaking my comments under any guise. As with all things, some of you may disagree, but some may think that the naked candour of my criticism is welcome. To skimp or not to skimp? Isn’t skimpiness the secondary subject?
After all, is it not the behaviour of the costume-wearer that should be at the bottom of it all? Isn’t that the primary issue? I’ve seen photos in the Press and social media of various carnivals recently, with fullyclothed (jeans and tee shirts) boys of around ages ten or twelve, gyrating on big, hard-back women. Fully covered, but simulating sexual behaviour.
While the minister was very vociferous a few days later on another topic – that of same-sex unions, mentioning that we as people have “gone soft” – his earlier remarks on Crop Over costume concerns displayed ostensible indecision.
In part, he stated, “I do not think our law should be changed to accommodate immoral behaviour or to tell our young people a story that is not based on how they should behave.” Think about the juxtaposition of those comments (or refrains) in context and let me know what you conclude.
Anyway, I done talk about skimpiness, six-thirty and simulation. But just one more thing with regard to our festival: with all the comments about the acronymical bra and its tightness, let me pose a question: is there any wire-bending this year with regard to Crop Over bands and tax considerations?
On another note, consider this: have you seen any African snails lately? Tombo, one of my beloved old boys, told me this,
“Dr Vee, I got bad Jericho veins (he meant ‘varicose’) so I went for a sea bath. I bring back seaweed an’ it done de snails.” Anyone tried it? Using seaweed to slaughter snails? According to Tombo, it works like a charm.
I plan to try it. And I will experiment on rats (since reports are that Government is out of rat poison) and other creepy things. In fact, I’ll send some seaweed for Stacey Williams too, since she was bawling out her liver in the middle of Bridgetown yesterday, because a spider was in her Love Bug. She spilled her protein whey shake, refused to drive the car further and walked – at snail’s pace – to Hastings. It took me down memory lane to Little Miss Muffet . . . . Remember her?!?
Veoma Ali is an author, broadcaster, advertising exec and, most important, a karaoke lover.
